Hobbies - Poetry - Anonymous
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You Sent Me A Flower. Again...

    You sent me a flower. Again.

    Scratched my head and kind of wondered
    Which of gardens have you plundered,
    Knowing how
    Then and now
    Raced my blood and my heart thundered...

    Torn the FRAGILE penciled sticker,
    In the candle's yellow flicker
    I just gazed
    Bit of dazed
    To the cage of slender wicker...

    Looked at it for many hours,
    Didn't look like any flowers
    I have seen
    Out or in
    Endless fields or soaring towers...

    Days have passed, then weeks were flowing,
    Not a sign of wilt was showing,
    Just at times
    Tingling chimes
    Mixed with sparks short moments glowing...

    Tried to think, to work, to slumber,
    All I could was only lumber,
    In my mind
    Was I kind
    Scared my life it might encumber?...

    Was I trying life's own riddle
    To decipher and to twiddle,
    While I tried
    To abide
    By its start and end and middle?...

    Was I taking my decision
    Riding on a head collision
    With my heart,
    Torn apart,
    With a life or with a vision?...

    Was I playing beyond senses
    Cutting through old magic's fences
    Like a child,
    Wishes wild,
    Rippling past my life's defenses?...

    Up. I stand. My body spent,
    Merging pain with soft lament
    Getting near,
    Love and fear,
    As my soul and heart ferment,

    And I touch the petals nest,
    First a petal facing west,
    Petals fold,
    Sand and gold
    Pour in endless loving quest...

    Then I touch a petal north
    Petals many folding forth,
    Leaving bare
    Trickling tears of reddish sort...

    East the petals now I touch
    Folding down they roll too much,
    Sunshine burns,
    Fire churns,
    Growling thunder's fearsome clutch...

    South I touch, a petals tide
    Folds unfolds an ocean wide,
    Screaming life
    Eons rife
    Bleeds a heart. My love. My bride.

    Times a whisper, times a thunder,
    Times a chiming here then yonder,
    Times a sighing,
    Times a crying,
    Times a trusting love's sweet wonder...

    Softly beating, asking, urging,
    Dreams of life and hopes emerging,
    Yes, your heart,
    Living art
    And its plea is gently surging...

    I approach, my fingers reaching,
    Blazing demons flying screeching,
    Touch I do,
    Touching you,
    On your coast my hand is beaching,

    As of sudden whispers cover
    Smiling tunes which lilt and hover,
    In my hand,
    As I stand,
    Flutters wild your heart, sweet lover.

    In my left your heart I feel,
    In my right I feel the steel,
    Rive my chest,
    Rib and breast,
    Carve an altar there I will,

    And for times no end no age,
    Way beyond life's final page,
    You and I,
    Eye to eye,
    Heart to heart in heaven's cage.




    Wish I was of beggar race,
    Dark of brow and thin of face,
    Spending nights in gutters dreaming,
    Passing days in hunger screaming,
    No regretting, no redeeming,
    Out of place...

    Wish your father was a king,
    In his castle's secret wing
    You would hide, afraid white day
    Your blue eyes will burn away
    Like the curse that witch did lay
    Back in spring...

    Wish the legend told was true
    Of the riddle known to few -
    ...Burning love of one unknown
    Will lay curse to grave of stone
    Binding life to death so lone,
    Life for you...


    Says the riddle - ...brown's the flower
    Black winged angels will devour,
    Blue the angels' roving home
    Reaching up to endless dome,
    Angel armies drift and roam,
    Soaring power...

    Says the riddle - ...red's the flowing
    Grey shaped angels' eyes are glowing,
    Green the angels' roving home,
    Reaching up to rustling dome,
    Angel armies drift and roam,
    Never knowing...

    Says the riddle - ...one so humble
    Will upon my meaning stumble
    And my angels' names surmise,
    And unfold my secret's guise,
    On his way to own demise
    Curse will tumble...


    Wish I knew a way of healing
    While in garbage I was kneeling
    Dreaming heaven mid of hell,
    Alter curse to shining spell,
    Known to none, and none to tell,
    My mind reeling...

    Wish I knew why this my fate,
    Known to none past castle's gate,
    Loving you - the one unknown,
    Angels' names - the one to own,
    I - the humble, I - the lone,
    Death to mate...

    Wish I knew why can't I part,
    I... not knight, nor prince, nor bart,
    Just for once you having seen,
    I - a nothing, you - a queen,
    Damned the witch that set the scene,
    Burned my heart...


    Says the legend, people telling
    In a field way far from dwelling
    Lies a beggar, dark brown eyes
    One black raven rips and flies
    Home, to blue-rich endless skies...
    Passions quelling...

    Says the legend, people chatter
    In a field way mid of patter
    Lies a beggar, red flesh chunks
    One grey wolf bites off and bunks
    Home, to green-rich rustling trunks...
    Passions shatter...

    Says the legend, people gazing,
    In the castle curtains raising,
    Gone the curse and walls are falling,
    Sun in droves through windows rolling,
    Tears of joy and lovers strolling...
    Passions blazing...


    Kings and queens have joined the wedding,
    Sleeps the pair in silken bedding,
    And afar, away from sight,
    Grows a tree of awesome might,
    Brown lined red, its leaves at night
    Tears are shedding...



Quintet Quartets...

    years ago... how many? two...
    two were we - was I, was you,
    nights ago... how many? none...
    we were one...

        *  *  *

    half a life did melt away,
    now i count each night, each day,
    reaching out each melting hour
    to my flower...

        *  *  *

    tracing far, back through the years...
    gazing forth... last countdown nears,
    barren life turned paradise
    through your eyes...

        *  *  *

    and if god two paths would offer -
    one marked life, and one marked charms,
    thousand years I'd swap for seconds
    in your arms...

        *  *  *

    kings and knights your heart are craving,
    laying rubies deep as knee,
    yet of all the world's rich treasures -
    you chose me...




    I tingle with eagerness,
    Of being with you, of seeing you, of you,
    There are times when I tremble just at your thought,
    From overwhelming feelings of love,
    From the path we are discovering together,
    From knowing who you are.
    You have changed my life,
    My life’s vision,
    My perceptions of words like us, love, we,
    You will read my eyes, my body, my soul,
    And know things I had forgotten or buried.
    So I shiver with anticipation,
    Of joining with you,
    Of being with you,
    Of finally touching you.
    And you know,
    As I know,
    That we are in love,
    And we shall be one forever.


Touching You...

    Touching you.
    Never did. Always trying.

    A few words you once sent me,
    Written in haste, in red ink,
    Wonder why not pink? you love pink...
    Reading each word ten times,
    Twenty times, a thousand,
    Holding your hand while it paints the letters,
    Running up their rounded sides,
    Down the sharp corners,
    Flying off the paper then landing softly again,
    Your faint perfume permeating the thin slightly crumpled paper,
    Invisible fingerprints decorating the folds,
    What is it? a smear? a teardrop?
    Or simply a pen stain that stuck to your finger,
    My finger tracing it and trying to feel the warmth it once absorbed from yours...

    A ribbon you used to pack a box,
    Kept it in my personal treasures box,
    Next to my kid's first recorded word, first fallen tooth,
    Next to my first love poem,
    Next to my first packaged pain...
    I tied it so many times,
    Then untied it,
    Mangled sailor's knots, then grandma's knots, then boy scouts',
    Imagining tying your finger to mine,
    Your life to mine,
    Coldly analyzing which one is the more reliable,
    As if my future depended on it,
    Defying king Gordius,
    Defying Alexander,
    Running the ribbon in my mouth, untying it with my teeth,
    Tasting crystals left over by your breath, by your mouth as you bit into it,
    Running my finger along it,
    Certain you did the same and we are now running the same path, the same road...

    A round piece of metal I rolled around my finger,
    It once visited your finger,
    Now it measures my blood stream, my heart's beat, my temperature,
    Sparkles hitting my eyes whenever it felt like I am not paying attention,
    Insisting that it visits every one of my fingers, on each hand, then again,
    Then inviting itself in my mouth,
    Telling me stories about the warmth of yours,
    Its sweet dew, its moist climate, ivory walls,
    Tiny deformations pointing proudly to the two spots you held it by,
    When before laying it on the velvety cloth,
    Before locking the box,
    You held it against your breast forever branding your heart's fire in its skin...

    Touching you.



Never Let Go...

    I 'was'.
    Body dead.
    Mind dull.
    My soul searching.
    You thought you knocked on the door
    But I felt the door burst open,
    Air as crisp as a frozen ocean gust,
    Seared me back from a region of numbness.
    You whispered a quiet question
    And I heard a scream that shook mountains,
    You smiled a slight smile
    And I saw an angel, wings spread, arms open.
    I saw love, and felt a love I had not felt before.
    My mind began to spin, my body awakened
    And, yes, my soul opened, completely.
    I have seen things I never thought possible,
    I have learned things I never dreamed existed,
    I have felt your touch, without touching,
    And savored your kiss, without kissing,
    And my very being, is alive again,
    And I will do anything in my power, to never lose that.
    You have abiding strength you don't feel,
    If you doubt, look at what you have done,
    Look about you and see what you have created,
    And feel in you... what I have,
    For all that I have is yours.
    Never let go.
    What I have, my inspiration, my dreams, are us,
    What you have, anytime you want, is we.
    In this time, in this place…..
    In this now, is a forever that is ours.



And I Dreamt...

    The night is quiet.
    I feel alone except for the ocean softly licking at my feet.
    The moon is bright, it dances off the soft swells of the waves.
    I think of the warmth of your body,
    the caress of your hand,
    just as the waves caress my feet.
    The water makes a gentle swoosh as it begins to bury my feet with sand.
    I dream of the gentle swoosh your heart makes,
    as I lay my head on your chest and you bury my heart with your love.
    I do not hear you as you come up behind me
    and put your arms around me from behind,
    holding my abdomen.
    You step in front of me and kiss me deeply,
    touching my face, searching...
    You then stand beside me, holding my hand,
    my head resting on your shoulder, your love in my heart.
    Nothing is spoken.
    Nothing needs to be said.
    I love you.



And I Smiled...

    The evening is uneventful, except for one enigmatic thing -
    I cannot beseech this adoring smile to leave my lips.
    Yes, it is the one you put there just a few hours ago.
    Let me indulge myself, in the pool of your deep brown eyes...
    Let me carry on and make a fuss about the way you play...
    It’s all in silence, lest someone could get inside my soul to hear it scream,
    For if they could, they would tremble at the knowledge of the perfect storm,
    If they would indeed even recognize what the tempest of true love creates...
    It is ecstasy beyond your wildest imagination, extreme power over heart and soul,
    A radiance inside that compares to nothing I have ever known...
    It is a war of bondage... as I know my heart shall never want to be free.
    The voice of love, never heard... laughter never shared...
    Inside this wall of repression, grow the realities of our life,
    The dragon that guards the gate, with a vicious flame of fire,
    Impenetrable rules with strong convictions...
    Then I ask myself, is the verdict in, have we been sentenced?
    And I smile, knowing the answer is no.
    For our love has a worth much stronger than the dragon,
    It will outlast time... and more powerful, than we may even know.
    It matters only, that you hear my voice, you share my laughter, and we share one heart.
    I welcome the bondage that this love has come to know and accept it with open arms,
    For without this storm of domination, two hearts could never have become one...
    And I would never have had the freedom, to fall in love, and to live in your arms, forever...
    And so, I smile, adoringly, because with all my heart...
    I love you...




    Young buds yawning lazily,
    Unable to close for long weeks to come their open toothless mouths,
    Birds returning home,
    Chatting at midnight and sleeping at noon,
    Still failing to accommodate the far south clock with the northern sun,
    Butterflies sleeping cocooned in their dreams of color,
    Before deciding it is their time to replace rainbows and flowers and sunshine...
    Fresh like an opening bud,
    Joyful like an awakening bird,
    Beautiful... like no butterfly could ever be...



You Know...

    You know, at times I like to rhyme,
    Though well I know that, given time,
    I'll waste the words that dress the verse,
    I'll move from nice to short and terse,
    Yet, look at all those inch thick tomes
    In crumbling rooms or crystal domes,
    Where words - much same - just spin and sink
    Which left, which right, which shyly blink,
    And power gain from tone of voice,
    From rolling round the dice of choice,
    Till finally a new born ode
    The might of words pulls up the road,
    With mighty flaps to dive, then fly,
    Down oceans deep, up mountains high
    Down souls in wait, up eyes in rain,
    Down dreams in hope, up hearts in pain...

    You know, at times I wish to steal
    Those words that bloodless wounds can heal,
    From yellowed pages time forgot
    And out of sight are left to rot,
    From shifting sands on rocky shores,
    From peeling bark, from slamming doors,
    Which hands so soft and hands so rough
    With ink, or knife, or sigh, or laugh,
    Have carved through eons since days old
    Rich colored dreams in dirt or gold,
    And brains so mighty, eyes so far,
    With fire, blood, or boiling tar
    Have smeared with fingers, body long
    Sad words of death through words of song,
    Wish that I could that mighty roar
    Way down my throat in thirst to pour...

    You know, at times I freeze and die,
    With blank impressions flitting by,
    With words a million screaming round
    So meaningless of sense and sound,
    Still waiting patiently and lost
    Through burning hell or scathing frost,
    Still waiting... Wishing? Seeing? Blind,
    Till... through my dead and frozen mind,
    Swift sudden shudders spark and run,
    I sense a touch of nearing sun,
    I sense a finger nearing brow,
    I sense... I wake, I blink, I know
    The sun, the life, the rhyme, the sense,
    The ever pain, the joy intense,
    The I, the why, the smile, the who,
    Your love, your laugh, your finger, you...




    Dreams will never do come true,
    Dreams where I lives dreams of you,
    Dreams... when you becomes a she,
    Dreams when I becomes a he,
    Gone is we...

    Dreams will never do abide,
    Dreams where eyes dream open wide,
    Dreams... when dreams turn off and die,
    Dreams when hopes turn off and fly,
    Sad goodbye...

    Dreams will never do to flowers,
    Dreams where mine and yours is ours,
    Dreams... when loss does follow pride,
    Dreams where ebb does follow tide,
    Deep inside...


    In the wee small morning hours
    I lay brooding in my towers,
    Stains of food upon my book,
    Doggie's snoring in his nook,
    And a stubble three days old
    Round my chin begins to mold,
    Just about to tear a page
    To my words to set a stage,
    When my double window glazing
    With a crack so loud, amazing,
    Splits to pieces three and twenty,
    Doggie wags his tail a plenty,
    And... what hell, this blinding fury
    Storms my house, no judge no jury,
    Buzzing wings on thunder riding...
    Hey there, pooch, where are you hiding?
    Get that fierce and hellish demon
    Burping like a drunken seaman,
    What's that rope round my left ankle,
    And your giggles me they rankle,
    Crazy witch, you ugly fairy,
    I will strangle you and bury,
    Leave my shirt, hey, leave my chest,
    This is not your coven's nest,
    Help... what's that, what are you doing?
    Off my nose or I'll be suing,
    Whaa.. oom...oom... moomoo... oo... out...
    (this is when she closed my mouth...)
    And with lips sweet soft and airy
    Flavored apple...grapes... and cherry,
    Drain she did my word, my tear,
    Way she moved, to eye, to ear,
    Do I hear?...


    Dreams will always do come true,
    Dreams where I lives dreams of you,
    Dreams... when you becomes my love,
    Dreams when I becomes your dove,
    Hand in glove...

    Dreams will always do abide,
    Dreams where eyes dream open wide,
    Dreams... when dreams take off and fly,
    Dreams when pains turn off and die,
    My, oh, my...

    Dreams will always do to flowers,
    Dreams where mine and yours is ours,
    Dreams... when loss precedes to pride,
    Dreams where ebb precedes to tide,
    Deep inside...



When All Of Me...

    When my soul loves you,
    My heart swells, goose bumps appear... I'm hot, I'm cold...
    When my mind loves you,
    I giggle and play, tease and enjoy...
    When my body loves you,
    I explode in ecstasy, like never before...
    And when I love you with all of me,
    I know there can never be another...
    There is only one you...
    Only one...
    Loving you, just loving you...



    You see, I am a caterpillar,
    You said,
    I see, you are the most colorful of butterflies,
    I said,
    You see, I am sand, I am lead,
    You said,
    I see, you are the clearest of crystals,
    I said,
    You see, I am a cripple,
    You said,
    I see, you are right,
    I said.

    I see, you are a devil, and you are missing the tail,
    I said,
    I see you are an angel, and you are missing the wings,
    I said,
    I see, you are a woman,
                and your mouth is a red flower,
                and your eyes are a blue flame,
                and your heart is a tender summer day,
    I said.

    I see you are right, I said.



Metamorphosis Two...

    Let the moon hide your face,
    So I can look at you
                and be blinded by the corona's stretching fire fingers...

    Let the night mask all but your eyes,
    So I can regard them
                and die still counting the countless exploding stars...

    Let the wind ruffle your hair,
    So I can crush under the colossal weight
                of mountain high swishing fragile petals...

    Let eternal quiet envelope the world,
    So I can smash against your shores
                lured by the siren song of your breath...



Abstract Two...

    So soft on my ear,
    Words, sounds, music,
    Caressing my thoughts, building images,
    Of life, legends, love,
    I close my eyes,
    To see, to feel, to immerse,
    Passers by node,
    Dogs bark,
    Cars swoosh mindlessly,
    I am not there,
    I float, I see myself seated,
    I see myself smile,
    I close my dream's eyes,
    I float, I see myself in my dream,
    I see myself closing my dream's eyes,
    I float, I am somewhere,
    Out of me, out of my dream,
    Waiting for what? waiting for whom?
    Is it for you?
    Looking around,
    Who is looking around?
    I? I in the dream? I outside the dream?
    Looking for sense, for direction,
    Looking for you?

    Are you?
    Do you exist?
    Are you part of this world's flesh or part of my dreams nebulae?
    Or part of my dream's dream,
    And when I wake and I fall into the dream,
    And when I wake again and I fall into the world,
    And when I wake in the world and I turn the ignition key,
    Gun the roaring motor to its hundreds horses neighing power
    And burn the tires right through the thick concrete wall?...

    So soft on my ear,
    Words, sounds, music,
    The moment of madness gone,
    I remove the key from the ignition, one never knows...
    And I swap dream with imagination,
    Imagining a woman,
    One woman I learnt to know years ago,
    Many, probably by the time I was born already,
    I knew her, it just took so long to meet her,
    Looking for her yet never knowing,
    Despairing for her yet knowing I will never meet her,
    Till I met her,
    In a dream turned life,
    In a life turned dream,
    My dream, my life,
    Are you?
    Do you exist?

    Shapes, colors, strange noise, voices,
    Many shapes but none the right,
    Many voices but none the right,
    A space left, waiting, pulsating, living,
    Waiting for your shape,
    Waiting for your voice,
    Waiting for you...



Clouded White...

    I'm drawing lines,
    I'm drawing points,
    I'm drawing circles, curves and joints,
    And shapes connect,
    And shapes get born,
    And shapes get thick... (my pencil's worn...),
    The page gives in,
    The page sounds trite,
    The page reflects the broken light,
                Like clouded white...

    I read the words,
    I read the lines,
    I read the spell in sentence shrines,
    Then add a sign,
    Then add a tone,
    Then add a joke, a sigh, a groan,
    A poem's smile,
    A poem's light,
    A poem's birth through misty night,
                Like clouded white...

    You sit and smile,
    You sit and read,
    You sit and drink with thirsty greed,
    The mumbled words,
    The mumbled coughs,
    The mumbled hiccups, curses, laughs,
    I see your joy,
    I see your plight,
    I see your mists clouding your sight,
                Like clouded white...



Thoughts, Drifting...

    I stand beside the window ledge, warm fingers of night breezes scamper through my hair,
    A trickle of sweat between my breasts annoyingly, I breathe in the dark, murky air,
    The ice is cool on my tongue rolling back and forth, fighting a battle of wills...
    Through the sweltering heat and starless sky, thoughts of him and I forget the heat,
    I forget everything for the moment, except his gentle sweetness and passion enthusiasm,
    How he tries so hard to spoil me, when it is not at all necessary for one who loves as he,
    For one as me, to feel like a little girl, to be a child held in his arms, within my thoughts...
    within my dreams, dipped into his magic, how could I be more spoiled?
    You cannot spoil someone with love, or can you? If there is a way, he found it... created it,
    I know because I have drowned in it... I know the depth, color, and touch of his love,
    It is a bottomless pit of hot reds, like passion, blues, like pain, black, like no tomorrow...
    It is pink, like calm, green, like nature, white, like the promise of tomorrow and forever...
    The touch is in his voice, in his laughter, words written swiftly from heart to paper,
    He sees love through his heart, and not his eyes... ignoring all detours... warnings...
    I open my tear filled eyes and see the foggy night is giving way to a moonlit sky,
    Stars twinkle above me, love surrounds me as he is near me... in the Autumn of my life...



Fading Dreams...

    dedicated to the one I love,
    may her dreams never fade away as mine so often did...

    I huddle in a corner,
    Knees against my chin,
    Locking arms around each shoulder with a mind in spin,
    Under lowered eyelids,
    Rolling in their cage,
    Pools of whirling muddy water foam in mindless rage,
    Mid of screaming thunder
    Wild dreams ride a boat,
    Gaping holes yawn toothless grins through a hull in rot,
    Dirty sails in tatters,
    Clutch at broken mast,
    Idly rides another crest pray to time and rust...

    Who's that scrawny sailor,
    Stumbling on the deck,
    Stinking yellow oil lamp hanging from his wizened neck,
    Salt encrusted fingers,
    Dirty fingernails,
    Pulling up his weary muscles long the biting rails,
    Haggard eyes on fire
    Inside hollow cracks,
    Gripping low the hefty handle of a dulling ax,
    Nears a darkened galley,
    Nears a wooden door,
    Lifts his muscle and the padlock splinters with a roar...


    Wide the valley proudly flowing down from mountain misty peaks,
    Flows a herd of snow white stallions long the shallow turbid creeks,
    Free of bridle, free of saddle, ironless the glinting hooves,
    Neighs the tidal wave its tantrum as its fury onward moves,
    Chasing like a mindless torrent one black giant mare ahead,
    On its neck - the naked vision miles ago its cloth has shed,
    Flying hair like yellow ribbons whips the dust cloud in its wake,
    Shrieking laughter splits the mountain rippling through black rock and lake,
    Rides the fairy to her lover, tiny hands like steely springs
    Holding to a mane in flurry like a wilderness of wings,
    Rides the fairy to her lover, dowry bringing thousand heads
    Stolen from her father's stables' fire hearted thoroughbreds...

    There's a tower down there sunward, one more half of riding day,
    One red banner beacons wildly like a serpent lost of way,
    Wild the gallop, wild the fever in her bouncing naked breasts,
    'Cause she knows she won the kingdom, this is tenth and last of quests,
    And her handsome fiery lover, prince of west till up way north,
    By tomorrow in his palace she his bride will be henceforth,
    In his arms the pains of warring she forget will till days old,
    In his bed amid the cushions she will lose her lace and gold,
    And while pouring sweat on fire they will mount the skyward gate
    Hugging death through wild desire, chasing lovers only fate,
    And tomorrows many thousands they will rule this blessed land,
    Side by side, with love and justice, eye in eye, and hand in hand...

    There's the gate, banners presenting in majestic proud salute,
    On she rides, on... then of sudden... like a shrieking wailing flute...
    What's this noise, what is this rumble, what's this sudden salty spray?
    What's this sudden gaping darkness cutting right across her way?
    Where's the tower, where's the castle, where's the lover's greeting face?
    Who's that faceless wizened figure sad of eye and bare of grace?...
    Wispy fingers back she stretches to a fading dying light,
    As her mare the clouds is nearing merging boldly with the night,
    And her gaze with pain is watching as her world is getting slain,
    Like a dying smoke the stallions dissipate through drizzle rain,
    Fades the thunder, fades the wonder, fades unborn the pleading scream,
    And in thousand fading fragments whiffs away the fading dream...


    Up he looks a breath catch moment to a patch of white-blue cloud,
    Ten man deep the pit above him, one man wide the rocky shroud,
    Fifteen knots the rope is hanging, fifteen more it has to bear,
    Boiling sweat his brow is pouring on the wounds his fingers wear,
    Picks the elf the flint ax handle and the wood and muscle blend,
    For a moment he is pausing... do I want to reach the end?...
    Then defiantly his laughter echoes wild in the confine,
    Bites through half a giant bread loaf, gulps a mouthful blood red wine,
    As he strikes the rocky bottom with a power born of will
    Quakes the rock as sharp edged pebbles in a shower round him spill,
    As he strikes the rocky bottom dries his mouth with blinding crave
    For the spring's cool magic waters flowing down to stony grave...

    Nineteen knots... he pulls the rubble up the pit's dust laden shaft,
    Twenty three... the rope is cutting through his body front and aft,
    He can smell the air gets thicker with a dank and whirling steam,
    Very soon his head be sunken in the shallow golden stream...
    Just one drop, and elf to human would have changed inside one moon,
    By his bride, the gentle maiden, he would stand... a mortal groom,
    His divine ancestral powers to be slain by woman kiss,
    And his life be cut forever... mortal size... and mortal bliss...
    On a bed of autumn petals their agony will flare
    When a breast as white as summer in abandon and despair
    Crushed will be against the muscle deep a chest of hardest stock...
    Almost there... his fist he smashes through the last of crumbling rock...

    There's the sparkle, softly water gushes forth at length of hand,
    Fingers reach... then of sudden... like a world forever banned...
    What's this noise, what is this rumble, what's this sudden salty spray?
    What's this sudden gaping darkness cutting right across his way?
    Where's the spring, where is the water, where's the mortal's sweet embrace?
    Who's that faceless wizened figure sad of eye and bare of grace?...
    Angry fingers back he stretches to a fading dying sight,
    As his body clouds is nearing merging boldly with the night,
    And his gaze with pain is watching as his world is getting slain,
    Like a dying smoke the mountains dissipate through drizzle rain,
    Fades the thirst, and fades the wonder, fades unborn the pleading scream,
    And in thousand fading fragments whiffs away the fading dream...


    Plains of bluebells by the thousands gently swaying in the breeze,
    Lakes of snowdrops shyly staring down at grains embraced by freeze,
    Crocus oceans wildly waving against shores of iris gems,
    Bare of foot a smiling maiden weaves a crown of tender stems,
    By her side a youth is lying drowned in bed of rustling leaves,
    Rainbow bugs rush in the shadow of his open dangling sleeves,
    Bends the maiden, swapping sun ray with the flash of laughing eyes,
    Lightly colored endless hair strands nose they tickle most unwise
    As the youth of sudden sneezes and he grabs her by the waist
    With a lover's gentle fury bites her lips, hot cherry laced,
    And when stardust sun is chasing to its lair way westward down,
    Lays the maiden on his dark brow the majestic flowers crown...

    One more sunset, one more sunrise, at the cock's proud raising cry,
    In the white of shiny satin speckled thin with blue of sky,
    Young a maiden she will offer all of soul, of love no end,
    To a youth that passion's fire with her tender smile will blend,
    One more night spell, one more day charm, one more breathless stretching wait,
    Face to face, shoulder to shoulder, painting thoughts on whispers plate,
    Drinking words of no sense meaning lightly flying lip to ear,
    Seeing morrows wrapped in silver through the spark of lover's tear,
    Wading back through parting rainbows, greeting birds in tuneless songs,
    Thickly laid across the meadow flutter butterflies in throngs,
    Far out back the crushed impression of embrace adorns the field,
    Heart in heart the ever after two proud souls will learn to wield...

    There's the day, the cheer and laughter, boy and girl with eyes ablaze
    Hands they join... then of sudden... like an icy stabbing haze...
    What's this noise, what is this rumble, what's this sudden salty spray?
    What's this sudden gaping darkness cutting right across the way?
    Where's the crowd, where is the music, where's the lover's sunny face?
    Who's that faceless wizened figure sad of eye and bare of grace?...
    Trembling fingers out are stretching to a fading dying might,
    As their hands apart are tearing merging boldly with the night
    Their gaze with pain is watching their world is getting slain,
    Like a dying smoke the lovers dissipate through drizzle rain,
    Fades the magic, fades the wonder, fades unborn the pleading scream,
    And in thousand fading fragments whiffs away the fading dream...


    I huddle in a corner,
    Knees against my chin,
    Locking arms around each shoulder with a mind in spin,
    Under lowered eyelids,
    Rolling in their cage,
    Pools of whirling muddy water foam in mindless rage,
    Mid of screaming thunder
    Wild dreams ride a boat,
    Gaping holes yawn toothless grins through a hull in rot,
    Dirty sails in tatters,
    Clutch at broken mast,
    Idly sinks dark fathoms deep pray to time and rust...

    Huddled in a corner,
    Knees against my chin,
    Limp the arms lay in my lap with a shiver thin,
    Under lowered eyelids,
    Frozen in their cage,
    Pools of stale and shallow water die of endless age,
    Gone the screaming thunder,
    Gone the dreams and boat,
    Gushes death through gaping holes, hull and anchor bloat,
    Dirty sails in tatters
    Tear away from mast,
    Dreams majestic, gallant, proud, idly go to dust...




    Well, around the place I come from,
    East of West, a place called home.com,
    Quadrupeds that miaow are Mitzi's,
    Some bipeds name breasts as Tzitzi's,
    And the race that barks are Bobby's
    (Some are biting, harmless hobbies...).

    It was one late autumn evening,
    Outside windy, wet and drizzling,
    I just started munching idly
    On what's being known so widely
    As the scottish Big... (ooh... ee...
    I will not ad them for free...)...

    Anyway, as I was telling,
    (Do forgive my careless spelling)
    I was busy mouthfuls chewing,
    Here and there in shivers spewing
    'Cause The Raven I was reading
    Master Poe my nerve ends kneading,

    "...While I nodded, nearly napping,
    suddenly there came a tapping,
    As of some one gently rapping,
    rapping at my chamber door.
    'Tis some visiter,' I muttered,
    'tapping at my chamber door'...

    I was reading, my nerves snapping,
    ...suddenly there came a tapping...
    Through my nose the coke came whistling
    As my hair like barbs went bristling,
    Spewing chips and bits of cabbage
    I picked up the yucky garbage,

    And I neared the screeching door,
    One blunt fork (no gun, I'm poor...),
    Slowly widening the crack,
    Screaming wind... that's all... then WHACK!!!
    My big nose the door does flatten
    And I curse in broken Latin,

    When this... what?... this... thing, this... bubble,
    Am I really seeing double?...
    Hairy like an ape unshaven,
    Definitely not the Raven,
    Crashes 'tween my legs a growling,
    Is it running? Is it rolling?

    While through air I'm sailing, flailing,
    In my a.. the fork is nailing,
    (censorship... you will excuse,
    not allowed any abuse...)
    This hippopotamus' cousin
    In half second - half a dozen

    Of my pretzels, soft and tasty
    Down he (she?) gulps down, then hasty
    On she (he?)... well, IT... attention
    (what is this, the Fifth Dimension?...)
    Moves to my black olives bowl...
    What the hell you stinking troll,

    Get your fangs off my food trophy,
    What comes next, cigar and coffee?
    And my ass gets off the floor
    (Censors I shall fear no more...)
    With what dignity is left,
    This most horrifying theft

    I will punish, justice will
    Take its toll, and this until
    You there dirty critter... oops,
    What is that? my God, it poops...
    Horrified I scream... You slug,
    Get off my Chinese new rug,

    Fifteen hundred bucks ago,
    One day old, and all this dough
    Now will host your early meal?...
    Hey, what's that? was that a squeal?
    Slowly, limping, I approach,
    As the IT with mute reproach

    Big brown eyes towards me lifts,
    And its body slightly shifts,
    And its muzzle on a paw
    Weary lies... I look in awe
    As between her fury bits
    Four blind puppies suck her tits...


    Well, to make the story short
    (my boss screams for his report)
    Missis mongrel - brushed and clean,
    Sleek and shiny, proud and lean,
    At the door I have to ring
    So my slippers she can bring

    (once I tried to skip the rite,
    trust me, she can really bite...),
    After getting me all tame
    Now she teaches, all the same,
    Her plump progenies - the lore
    To pursue for ever more.

    Only there's a slight hiccup,
    Got my slippers... all chewed up.
    Worry not, I'm not enslaved,
    Human race's pride I saved,
    'Cause in vengeance named them slobs -
    Blobby... and her little... Blobs.

    "And his eyes have all the seeming
    of a demon's that is dreaming,
    And the lamp-light o'er him streaming
    throws his shadow on the floor;
    And my soul from out that shadow
    that lies floating on the floor

    Shall be lifted—nevermore!"
    (oh my Lord, and do they snore...
    now I may not have one Raven,
    yet, by now, twelve Blobs unshaven,
    worry not, as I said loud -
    I'm in charge... well, if allowed...)




    Feel like writing you a poem,
    Only I'm too tired,
    And when I'm tired I may sound corny.

    Very unfashionable. Yet, I love corny.
    Does everything have to be sophisticated,
    Messy, understood by the elite few that pretend they do,
    Do they actually?
    Is there actually something to understand in the "messy"?

    I love corny.
    The simple I love you,
    The simple rhyme of love - dove,
    Of life - wife, of kiss - bliss - miss,
    Words that I understand, words that everybody understands,
    They will never get a Pulitzer or whatever...
    So what?
    They are warm, they are kind, they are human...

    I love corny.
    When simple people go to such pains to write simple words,
    Spending at times a day to find a rhyme to words like heaven
    Only to end up with words like seven
    And then fighting for another day so hard to link them,
    Going to such pains at writing the hottest of passions
    In the simplest of words known to them,
    Simple people's words,
    Greatest words,
    True words, real love's words,
    From real people to real people.

    I love corny.
    I wish I knew the corniest way to tell you... I love you...



The End Of It...

    Lay upon my ears
    All your darkest fears,
    And by the time to moonlight glow
    Falling stars will change to flow
    Of tears,
    Fears will fade for evermore in the worlds of never know...

    Bring into my life
    Sharpest blade of knife,
    And by the time the sun will pry
    Open gates to bluest sky
    For my wife,
    Knives in yielding flesh will sculpt all the magic of the why...

    Ask me now again,
    Things like where and when,
    And by the time my pain's to rest
    Once you carved my heart from chest
    When the night will paint my eyes you will guide me to your nest...



My Debt...

    How can I pay my debt to you?
    For waking me up from dreamless sleep,
    For carrying me into lands unknown,
    For whispering to me in languages unspoken...

    I was a grown up.
    You made a kid of me,
    And with a curse
    You broke both lock and key,
    You let me run,
    And wildly chase the spell,
    Because you knew
    That heaven hides in hell...
    You lay aside,
    And watched me climbing wild
    The walls of life,
    The depths of paining child,
    With laughing eyes,
    Your hands under your chin,
    Because you knew
    That beauty lies in sin...
    The days have passed,
    You waited soft and wise,
    The months, the years,
    You watched my lows, my highs,
    Because you knew
    At end of testing quest
    My rest I'll find,
    Against your wanting breast.

    I won't pay my debt to you,
    'Cause for my debt I want to be enslaved by you,
    'Cause for my debt I want to burn alive for you,
    'Cause for my debt I want to lose my soul to you...



Tunes Six...

    When my honey
    Tells a funny,
    All the money
            in the Knox
    Is a poor sad
    Lump of cold lead
    Like a brain dead
            pile of rocks.

    When my baby
    Tells me maybe,
    May the day be
            dark or blue,
    It's a promise
    Saying "Home is
    Not where Rome is,
            but where you."

    When my sweet one
    Tells me "Hey hon,
    Where's the day's sun
            gone the while?"
    "Gone's to plunder
    Storm and thunder,
    Spark and wonder,
            from your smile."

            * * *

    I remember when I swore
    'Not again', and 'Never more',
    Till that moment, fragile blue,
            I met you.

    Days through months through years have passed,
    Simple, pale, so smooth, so fast,
    Till that moment, soft of hue,
            I met you.

    Never wished to taste again
    Softness sweet of love insane,
    Till that moment, born anew,
            I met you.

    Stale the pledge and worn the years,
    Fades the pain from souvenirs,
    From this moment, my life through,
            I love you...

            * * *

    Armed with coke, some chips, and nuts,
    Stinking spray (those flying gnats...),
    Turned the light, a mellow glow,
    And the swing was swinging low,
    As my eyes were reaching bright
    To an evening of delight,
            Oh, that night...

    It was thick, a tome three pounds,
    As the sunset world surrounds,
    Read the title once again,
    Poetry, From Man to Man...
    With my heart a flutter wild,
    In my eyes I knew I smiled
            Like a child...

    Poem one, first line, first word,
    Knarry... what's that, singing bird?
    Night's so young and I'm so fresh,
    No fatigue in soul and flesh,
    Webster's helped me start anew,
    Few words further, hmm, so few,
            I'm so sorry... shew?

    No fatigue in flesh, yet soul...
    Well, I empty one nuts bowl,
    And my courage's on the swell,
    Panegyrical... what hell?
    And absquatulate?... my God...
    Clurichaun? And on I plod,
            In my mind a firing squad...

    After page... 'bout twenty three,
    After scissure,... obloquy...
    And the coke starts sipping through
    Pages nine to fifty two,
    I decide, well, that's enough,
    I may be of lower stuff,
            Or... could this be bluff?

    My dear poet, you may be
    World's most famous prodigy,
    But as long as simple us
    Don't get half your gist or cuss,
    Please just take your gift of gab
    (Sorry, but it's kind of drab)
            Back to lab...

    So, my love, I tried and failed,
    My old simple self prevailed,
    And through chips, and nuts, and coke,
    Times I'll sing, and times I'll croak,
    But it's me, it's mine, it's I,
    It is yours, my laugh, my cry,
            Till I die.




    You cringe in fear at the pain,
    True, it hurts,
    I know,
    I've been there,
    And the only thing I can promise you is the pain,
    A pain such as you've never faced before,
    Not even while your child was bursting from your body...

    I don't want you to face this pain.
    I said "I don't want you to face this pain,
    I can wait,
    Years, millenniums..."
    You don't.
    You don't want to wait millenniums,
    Not even years...
    "Not fair..." you say,
    "Love is happiness,
    Love is pain,
    I knew it the moment my child burst from my body..."

    "I've been there" I say,
    "You can't become immune to pain,
    It's dominating your body, your life,
    You can fight it with your spirit
    But you can never conquer it,
    You can make it your ally,
    Forcing it to prove to yourself the sacrifice you're ready to make,
    And it still hurts,
    You can make it your counsel,
    Letting it guide you through the minefield of truth and illusion,
    And it still hurts,
    You can make it your master,
    Allowing it to decide for you,
    And it still hurts..."
    "I know..." you say,
    "I've been there,
    It was my ally and it hurt,
    It was my counsel and it hurt,
    I've been there when my child burst from my body..."

    "I've been there..." you say,
    "I've been there,
    It was never my master,
    It will never be, even if it promises to stop hurting..."




    Touching fingers,
    My rugged fingertips touching your soft ones,
    My right hand creating an asymmetrical steeple with your left,
    Tips to tips,
    Slowly joining the first finger joints, then the middle,
    Then the lower,
    Till your fingers fully lie against mine,
    Snuggling against them,
    Softly, like an inanimate body awakening to life,
    Turning into a storm,
    Like flower touching sun,
    Boiling blood trying desperately to jump the skin barrier
    And join flow, arteries, veins, hearts, heart beats,
    Golden chain link touching golden chain link,
    Mine yours,
    Yours mine,
    Blue arcing light melting the metal,
    Ozone sting in the air,
    A mini sun's birth at contact point,
    Blinding, cutting through flesh,
    Two rings, one chain, one bondage,
    Slaves of caged passion that no tear can extinguish,
    No word of man, no word of world,
    No word of angel, heaven, or hell,
    Scalding rivers in droplets invading the skin
    As the fingers intertwine,
    Sliding in between each other,
    Patches of flesh peeling away under the unyielding desperate grip,
    Each finding its last resting place in the nook between two others,
    At first stretched like a hunter's bow cord,
    Then slowly yielding,
    Bending, clasping,
    Palms uniting,
    Life line against life line,
    Birth against birth, death against death,
    Torment against torment,
    A grip, one fist, ten fingers,
    Two bodies,

    The grip eases,
    Each finger reluctantly leaving its prison,
    Each nook reluctantly releasing the prey from its clutches,
    Sliding out,
    Your blood raging in my veins,
    My ring trapping your finger,
    Our life lines knotted into each other,
    One moment,
    A single moment,
    One grain of sand in eternity's endless hourglass,
    For one single moment we had it all,
    Then the grain of sand slipped between the parting fingers,
    Dragging all eternity with it,
    Like a horse dragging a mountain,
    Like a tear dragging an ocean,
    Like a ray... dragging a sun...




    You took my hand
    And lightly squeezed...
    Did you hear?... an angel sneezed,
    Little devil,
    Playing games,
    Devil?... angel?... so what?... names...
    Fly away
    You silly creep
    Don't you give me cheeky lip,
    Want to join
    The loving school?
    This is for us humans, fool!
    Hey, know what?
    I'll let you see
    Just one lesson, this for free -
    Look my girl,
    You see? no wings...
    Not your silly feather things...
    All she needs
    Is touch my hand
    And I fly to heaven's land...
    Look my girl,
    A mortal shell?...
    Are your eons not a hell?...
    All she needs
    Is look my eye
    And I know I'll never die...
    Look my girl,
    A flower holds...
    Not your showy thunderbolts...
    All she needs
    Is kiss me once
    And I burn like seven suns...

    Told you one, I gave you three,
    When it starts... it's starlight spree,
    Be an angel, shoo away...
    You... your eons, I... one day...



Red And Blue...

    Never met you. Never? Once,
    In the twirl of spinning chance,
    For few seconds... Saw a face,
    A regard of pain and grace,
    Never fore so close I've been
    To a queen...

    Never touched you. Never? No,
    Passions wild set eyes aglow,
    In the void of hand till hand
    Armies battle for the land,
    Never fore my life did seem
    Living dream...

    Will I ever?... Will you?... Will
    Racing time the passion kill?
    One sharp ray from sunlight's bow
    Kill the dream with single blow,
    Far's the queen, and closed her eye,
    Dead am I...


    Lover dear, your forehead lay
    On my breast and hear my say...
    Never will your never live,
    Your harsh words I do forgive,
    This poor heart bleeds love for you,
    Red and blue...



Red And Blue, The Color Of You...

    Was it you that I met once upon a sweet dream,
    On a hill full of cookies and strawberry cream,
    Where we laughed and played and danced on a cloud,
    Built a castle of love, a bridge of hope, so proud?...

    Was it you that I touched once upon a sweet dream,
    And together we rode on a soft rainbow' beam,
    Where you played so bravely with words made of gold,
    Your heart light as red as a ruby of old?...

    Was it you that awakened a dream in the night,
    Upon two blind hearts you bestowed second sight,
    Was it you that I saw through a glass painted view
    Trying vainly to wipe from your smile shades of blue?...

    Was it you, was it me, who shed tears in the rain,
    As we walked out of dream and we opened the pain?...
    No longer protected by our world far away,
    It happened so fast when we two stopped to play...

    Was it we that we touched once upon a sweet dream,
    So real, so painful, we're aching to scream?...
    So happy, so sad, one heart red, two smiles blue,
    We don't have an answer, except... I love you...




    Hummingbird your hum so sweet,
    Do you come from end of street?
    Hovering around my face,
    No, I ain't of flowers race,
    And you look my mouth so straight...
    Oh, one moment, don't push, wait!...
    Look, I open it a bit...
    What's this cherry red and sweet
    That inside my mouth you squeeze...
    Hey, your flutter tickles... please...
    Now around my ear you fly
    Whispering... you talk?... oh my...
    That my love from way afar
    Way beyond the northern star,
    With her lips this cherry kissed
    'Cause her lover much she missed,
    Then she smiled... the night was torn,
    Then she sang... the sun was born,
    The she called... and you came by,
    Then she begged you - "Fly, bird, fly,
    Over forests, oceans, wend
    To the world's forgotten end,
    Fly and find my lover's dwell,
    In your wings this magic spell,
    In your heart this fire's lit,
    In your beak this cherry sweet,
    Tell him that one day, not long,
    Fore the summer's dying song,
    Fore the Autumn's biting whip,
    He will taste and slowly sip
    Cherry wine, my kingdom's best
    From my lips, and from my breast..."

    "Hummingbird, hum close to eye
    Pick a tear before you fly,
    Let it drop into the sea,
    If my lover finds the drop
    She'll find me.

    Hummingbird, hum close to heart
    Pick a drop of blood and part,
    Let it drop into the sun
    If my lover finds the drop
    I'm the one.

    Hummingbird, hum back your home,
    Time you stop your humming roam,
    Hum into my lover's ear
    Humming sighs she loves to hear,
    Tell her countless summers by,
    Tell her countless Autumns fly,
    Tell her countless years I'll wait
    Humbly begging at her gate,
    Tell her - know I, I'll be graced
    And one day she'll grant me taste
    Cherry wine, her kingdom's best,
    From her lips, and from her breast..."



Visions Three...

    There was pain in your voice,
    Hidden in a forest of laughter,
    Dressed in multi colored freshly painted clothing of joy,
    All I had to do is push the branches out of way,
    Regard through the transparent fabric,
    And then I could see -
    The pain,
    The questions,
    The denial...

    Your arms outstretched,
    Are your fingers curled in tiny powerful fists,
    Ready to punch holes through life's steel shell,
    Or stretched open,
    Ready to touch, caress, grab life's unfulfilled promises?
    All I had to do is touch them...

    Your eyelids lowered,
    Closed eyes seeing the infinite impossibilities,
    The endless hopelessness,
    The nevers, so many, so damn powerful, so mockingly haughty...
    All I had to do is see for them...

    Your heart beating like mad gone jungle drums...
    All I had to do is hear the call, listen to it, answer it...

    I heard, listened, can I answer
    And smite the pain, the questions, the denial,
    Carefully lay life's promise in your arms,
    Cut the never, the hopelessness, into destiny fulfilled,
    Touch your heart, lull it to blessed sleep
    Knowing that tomorrow is the beginning of forever?...




    I remember it,
    Flowing through our veins like wild neighing stallions,
    Thundering hooves echoing between our chests,
    Mouths agape, gulping thirstily mouthfuls of air
    With madness of hurricane reborn,
    Bleeding teeth marks carved on shoulders,
    Fists crushing chest, crushing breast,
    Long bloody trails down arched backs,
    Down hips glued in muscle tearing spasm,
    Down thighs locked in crushing immobility
    While fingers lock to fingers,
    Mouth locks to mouth,
    Chest locks to chest,
    Yesterday locks into today locks into tomorrow...
    Hunger satisfied,
    Passion asleep,
    And only leftover is... absolute, abysmal, bottomless love...



Abstract Three...

    I smiled at you last... when?
    A few year-long days ago?
    Was it longer?
    Lost count, time flowing by indifferently,
    Your eye locked on my word, on my mouth,
    Trying to force it with your mind's incessant need into the shape,
    Into the sound,
    Into the smile...

    I see you,
    Looking cross eyed at those close range lips refusing to open,
    Pulling at mouth's corners once with your little finger,
    Once with your cheek,
    Even with your eyebrow,
    Yet I stubbornly refuse,
    Because I am so full of empty, so empty of full, so distant...

    Blessed numbness engulfs me...
    Blessed?... then why do I hear this voice screaming in my head,
    Asking, urging, demanding obeisance,
    Shattering the numbness into cutting fragments of maddening pain
    Ricocheting incessantly between walls of awareness
    Exposed naked to the recurring onslaught of want, of need,
    Of crave...

    I smiled at you last... when?

    And you kiss my brow,
    Softly whispered vow
    Crashes through the gate
    Smashing lock and grate,
    "Boy... my boy, so dear,
    Quell I will your fear,
    As the rain does fall,
    As the bird does call,
    As the tear does dry,
    As the day does die,
    As your smile I see
    Wrap the whole of me
    Layers thick as life,
    I'm your bride, your wife..."



My Brother Icarus...

    I take off my shoes,
    My socks,
    Shed my trousers,
    Lose my shirt,
    Tear my underwear,
    Naked. At the edge of the cliff. The world stretching before me, wide.
    I raise my arms to the sky,
    Raise my eyes,
    Waiting for a sign from a God that is not there,
    Waiting nevertheless,
    Maybe I invented him and he will,
    But I invented him and he will not...

    I fly,
    Looking for signs of Icarus,
    He did not fall, he is still flying,
    I heard him calling to me, he is there asking for me to join him,
    Icarus, my brother, here I come,
    My wings my hands, my sails my dreams,
    My anchor my life,
    I fly...

    My hands flap, uselessly,
    My sails billow as powerless as giant white clouds,
    My anchor takes hold of my body and pulls me down,
    Faster, faster, mother earth rising to meet me, to hug me in its mighty embrace,
    Take me mother,
    Gather my strewn body parts into your warm lap,
    Smother me with your endless love,
    Make me forget my endless love...




    And when I die,
    And when I don't hear the rumble of awakening earth no more,
    And when star sparks become a never remembered memory
    And roses perfume the air for all but me,
    I lock the gate,
    Break the key,
    And my forgotten garden decays into blissful nothingness...



You, I, Us...

    yearnings old,
    suspires soft,
    infinite, absolute, naïve desire,
    kindling affection threading heavenly yarn,
    wanton euphoria astride rampant emotion overgilding nascent eternity...

    words, big words,
    not big enough to engulf the need,
    the passion, the endless ache demanding its rights,
    the right to rise, the right to burn, the right to never set...



At Times...

    You know,
    At times I am warring with myself,
    No logic, no reason, no explanation,
    I suddenly pick up a piece of paper and start filling it up with thoughts,
    Black, dark thoughts, fears, yearnings,
    Painting a future then scratching it out with a big powerful X,
    Yet it persists beyond the X,
    Mocking, laughing.
    Till all I feel I can do is keep on looking,
    Roll into a ball,
    Cringing with fear flooded with passion burning with desire,
    Wishing a wish to just lie down,
    And melt into... nothing.
    No fear, no passion, no desire...
    No memory...

    My eyes close. Quiet. What is it I seem to hear,
    Far, galloping nearer with the deafening thunder of thousands hooves?...
    A voice...
    A thin, smiling voice, a commanding voice,
    A child woman's voice calling in kid mockery to the world nope, yeap, mmmmm...
    Pulling my ear and blasting into it all of world's blasphemes,
    Cursing, praying, living,
    Waking me to life again,
    Closing her slender fingers over my guided fist and tearing the X,
    Make way painting, back to your ugly lair, make way or be trampled and torn to bits,
    Strangling my throat into a mighty shout,
    She loves me... you hear world?... she loves...
    Make way world or be burned by the soaring sunshine than engulfs me, enfolds me,
    Clothes me in the soft silken fabric of this woman's scorching love,
    Warms my today, promises my tomorrow...



The Link...

    I free you of your promise,
    I free you of your vow,
    I free you of your pledge to love
    Till sun turns cinder glow...

    I don't want chains of honor,
    I don't want chains of steel,
    I don't want chains of time to tie
    Your heart to dreams unreal...

    Your freedom if you want it
    I offer you untold,
    And if you don't... just touch my heart
    Through one small link of gold...



The Stranger...

    Upon a land, upon a time,
          Upon a world ago,
    Where love was banned, when song was crime,
          By king's decree and law,

    A stranger came one night from far,
          His horse bare hoofed and lean,
    His eye a well, his mouth a scar,
          His blade serrate and mean.

    By midnight late a wooden door
          He pounds with hurting fist,
    "My mouth is dry, my back is sore,
          My way is lost in mist.

    My horse some hay, my self some bread,
          I come away from war,
    A place to lay my weary head
          I'll pay you goldens four."

    Thick iron bolt the silence rips,
          Its rusted age decries,
    Twin raven braids, wine ruby lips,
          Deep seas of green sad eyes,

    A pallid hand the candle holds
          "Much hurry, stranger, come,
    Before the night to morn unfolds
          And streets rough up with scum.

    Me follow do..." around she goes
          Three tiny cuddled shapes,
    A gate to back, her head she bows,
          "Some hay, some bread and grapes..."

    Returns her way with swift a pace...
          "Young maiden, wait, your gold..."
    Around she looks with shadowed face,
          "It's given. Never sold."

    And then is gone. The dawning sleep
          Cuts man and horse alike,
    But on his face the frown is deep,
          He hears the midnight strike...


    The sun is up. With sudden rage
          He rolls and gets the blade...
    Three pairs of eyes of infant age
          Regard from corner's shade.

    The horse is brushed, his saddle shines,
          His boots wear glowing sheen,
    He shakes away his question signs
          In water cool and clean.

    To room she comes. A loaf of bread,
          A scrap of crusty cheese,
    A jar of milk, an apple red,
          She lays all on his knees.

    The hunger rumble's three days old,
          He gulps without a sound,
    They watch, the maiden shy and bold,
          The infants crouched to ground.

    The mouth he wipes with back of hand...
          The boots, the sword, the coat,
    He stands, his manner soft and bland
          His eyes away, remote.

    His voice, a thunder's looming trail,
          "Now tell my begging ear,
    Why yester night from darkness' veil
          You pulled me with no fear,

    My gold refusing with no shame,
          You fed me, cared my horse,
    A stranger I with not a name,
          My habit torn and coarse?

    What name you're called?..." "Milay..."
          He sighs, and makes to touch his purse,
    Her tiny fist locks his away...
          "Beg... save them from the curse..."

    She pulls the infants to her fore,
          Two maids, one dreamy knave,
    "In fortnight time ten dozen score
          Will never know a grave."

    Deep furrows cross the stranger's brow,
          "Milay, young maiden, tell
    What yarns your battered spirits plow
          And turn your life to hell?"

    The maiden looks upon his face,
          Her pained deserted eyes
    The shame of faltering embrace,
          The ailing soul despise.

    "A stranger you, not from this part,
          The first in seven year,
    No living soul or brazen heart
          Has dared and come anear.

    No one of here can ever go,
          No one that comes can leave,
    Your arm is strong, your blade you know,
          Your horse I shoed last eve.

    I beg of you to leave away,
          Take these the infants three,
    And if you ask my price to pay,
          I give myself to thee..."

    Her hand he holds, a shivers glides
          Through body thin and frail,
    "Now tell me maid, and count your strides,
          This cursing evil tale."


    The sun has moved a quarter sky,
          She talks with eyes ashine,
    The stranger gets a gleam in eye
          As good with evil twine,

    And through the flow of words of past
          He hears the blare of horns,
    A ruthful king is slain and cast
          His body clad in thorns,

    A ruthless puppet holds to throne,
          And pay tribute he must
    With babies not yet ten years gone,
          The gold, his greed and lust.

    All men to slaves deep golden mines
          Away from light to rot,
    All women slave the endless vines
          Through sun's afire hot.

    With fear they count the passing nights,
          And hope to never wake,
    But lord of wrongs chased lord of rights,
          And hopes are there to break.

    Full moon, at midnight's glowing beam
          Wild parties comes atrot
    To snatch away from infants' dream,
          The dozens picked by lot.

    And scores of women ripe to bear
          Are raped as night goes through,
    To sound of garment rip and tear,
          To smell of evil brew.

    No place to run, no hole to hide
          About the guarding scum,
    By break of dawn away they ride,
          Behind... dry blood, and glum.

    The infants... doomed to slave or whore
          And none will ever turn,
    Some groomed to die in grisly war,
          In foreign lands to burn.

    "One brother have I lost last moon,
          One sister twelve moons past,
    These babies three so very soon
          I’ll see of them the last...

    Oh stranger, by my wish abide,
          So sweet these angels' seed,
    Reave them from town and westward ride,
          I ask of you and plead..."

    The stranger's face is iron mask
          His eyes a stormy sea,
    "I have a maid, she is your age...
          What will become of thee?"

    A smile... oh lord of east and west,
          The smile she let arise...
    "This here the dagger in my breast
          Shall strike to my demise..."

    Was this the pride in maiden chest
          Of queenly size and might?
    The stranger's mind a stormy nest,
          His soul the darkest night.

    Rough hand the deathly blade withdraws
          With gentle forceful care,
    "At mid of night when wine tide flows
          The road lays dark and bare,

    The hooves I'll dress in many cloth,
          And out of place I'll steal,
    You stay behind and dare you not
          To fear and shame to kneel.

    Believe I know to name this land,
          Unfriendly and aloof,
    Its masters dwell hind desert's sand,
          Its guards bear heavy hoof,

    Yet never word has come to world,
          Of cruelty as such,
    The tale of hurt you here unfurled,
          The deathly evil clutch,

    My king is just, way back from war
          'Bout seven days from here,
    Since days unknown and kings of yore
          My land has known no fear.

    All wicked ways to fight and root
          Out lands afar and near,
    He, who by sword lives mean and brute,
          Dislodge by sword and spear.

    Away I rode ahead of mine,
          My heart to kin at home,
    But now this hurt of yours, and thine,
          Makes hell's tar gentle foam.

    Your land will live, I thus thee pledge,
          Oh, maiden young and brave,
    These are the words I thee allege,
          My oath on mother's grave".

    He hugs the infants, small and shy,
          A tiny hand, a kiss,
    He looks the maiden in the eye,
          That fathoms deep abyss...

    "The dagger - here, I lay at gate,
          If takes the road too long,
    And gone the last of time to wait,
          You choose what right what wrong.

    Be blessed child." The last he spoke,
          And went his horse to tend,
    At mid of night, fore midnight's stroke,
          He made his way to wend.

    A silent trot of barely hear,
          Got lost down alleys dark,
    A maiden, pale with pride rich fear,
          Graved out the first day's mark.


    By seventh day and seventh notch,
          And candles burnt to naught,
    Expectant eyes the mountain watch,
          Is now they here be ought?...

    Then nine, then ten, another rut
          So deep and wildly cursed,
    The eye is blank, the spirit shut,
          To death ten candles nursed.

    Come thirteen days, deep thirteenth slash,
          Thick candles light the cell,
    Young grit and heart in anguish crash,
          In fear of coming hell...

    Is fourteen days... and eve a come,
          Lost shapes hind heavy bolts,
    In wait for nearing distant drum,
          Dark fear each soul assaults.

    Where is thy pledge, oh, dark eyed man,
          Where is the oath you made?
    Or did the scare your courage ban
          And sheathed vow and blade?

    Where is thy king, the fearless just,
          The army you have told,
    Or is your promise worth of dust,
          Your words of stenching mold?

    The drums I hear, the raging waste,
          Foul fists lay waste my door,
    This dagger here my breast will taste
          My blood will feed this floor,

    Accursed be, your promise vile,
          And damned your house and seed,
    Your next of kin shall perish, while
          To death... I slowly bleed...


    A sudden hush. A noise so pale,
          A rumble low and mean,
    Is this the sound of nearing hail
          From sky resplendent clean?

    Or rustle is of flying leaves
          Across the desert sand,
    Of locusts' swarm that silence cleaves
          Away to rob the land?

    The rumble grows, the rustle highs,
          Is hail? Is leaves? Is swarm?
    Is raising dust that hides the skies
          The bode of breeding storm?...

    Like a waking stretching lion trading yawn with mighty roar,
    Wakes the thunder over mountain with a giant fearsome snore,
    Sails a king ahead of armies on a stallion color night,
    Rides a chieftain hind king's banner dark of brow and bold of might,
    Race behind the endless legions like a torrent born in hell
    As it gushes forth and billows into fearsome sweeping swell,
    Braided manes with woven ribbons stretch to rear with flutter snaps,
    Ointed shields with spiky rivets glint fore gruesome metal caps,
    Thousands hooves bear thousands riders stretching thousands heavy bows,
    Moves the wall of crushing iron cutting lanes through fiendish rows,
    Thousands arms wield thousands maces with a windmill's shrieking sound,
    Lying waste the guarding towers torn to shreds on rumbling ground,
    Thousands spears cut yielding armor with the ripping sound of hail,
    Thousands swords descend with anger finding bone through rending mail,
    Onward hastes the tidal fury breaking walls and crushing gates,
    Never halting till the wars god with the blood his hunger sates.

    The storm has died beneath the sky,
          The clanking and the moans,
    A rushing party gallops by,
          Hoof sparks upon the stones,

    Through narrow alleys moving in,
          The silence deep and hard,
    Where scuttling mice leftovers glean
          From drying bones and lard,

    Ahead... a door... a broken hinge,
          A hurried rush inside...
    Three huddled shapes in terror cringe,
          And try in vain to hide.

    Upon the floor an angel sleeps,
          So white the dress, the face,
    The red of life through garment seeps,
          And stains the ruptured lace...


    The dawn has set, the sunset dawns,
          Soft light inside the tent,
    Bird chirping tunes long rippling lawns
          The silence sweetly dent.

    "I didn't know that hell could be
          So gentle warm embrace,
    And waking up beyond I'd see
          So warm and gentle face."

    Twin raven braids, wine ruby lips,
          Deep seas of green sad eyes,
    A slender hand a rough hand grips,
          A vise in soft disguise...

    "I cursed your life, I cursed your death,
          I cursed your seed and light,
    I should have cursed my soul and breath...
          You came, your king, your might..."

    The green sad eyes then close, a weak...
          "My kin?..." he smiles... "Unhurt..."
    Twin crystal droplets slide down cheek
          And blaze a trail through dirt.

    Her grip is fierce, unheard the words...
          "And I... who dead should be?..."
    A hush... no horse, no chirping birds,
          No man, no wind, no tree...

    The sun has stopped mid westward rush,
          The grains of time mid fall,
    Her face alight with sunrise blush,
          His fist a fearsome maul.

    He slides his hand towards the stand,
          The dagger stained and keen,
    "The gods of life deceived your hand,
          "You missed... one finger thin...

    Your heart is sane, your body young,
          Your wound will heal like none,
    All words of songs so long unsung
          Your soul will flood like one.

    In number dawns you up and mount
          A horse I leave behind,
    As rich of spark as stars uncount,
          As young as you of mind,

    His mane the black of starless night,
          His heart the white of snow,
    His hoof the flame's ease skywards flight,
          His haste a bolt from bow...

    This land's one thousand stoneless ways
          Like wildest wind to roam,
    And when too long and many days,
          Return you will your home.

    The freedom's yours, taste deep, rejoice,
          The fear is out of land,
    Tomorrow's shape your kinfolk's choice,
          Let heart be your command.

    In fortnight time to leave I must,
          This dagger tasted blood,
    I leave it here, a pledge of trust..."
          ...And snaps it with a thud.

    The howl of wolves lays day at rest,
          And grief gives heart a wring,
    And quiet breeds in maiden chest
          Tomorrow, she will sing.



Make Believe...

    I knew it does not exist.

    Only in stories.
    Authors paid for telling it,
    An editor, several distributors, ghost writers,
    Editing, re-writing, erasing, spell checking,
    Adapt to popular taste, to buyers taste,
    Then sell it,
    Get paid for it, for making believe...
    Then forget it,
    Next please...

    Only in songs.
    Singers paid for singing it,
    Tens of technicians, musicians, conductors,
    Pushing buttons, moving levers, correcting balance,
    Try first, try second... try until it sounds right,
    Then sell it,
    Get paid for it, for making believe...
    Then forget it,
    Next please...

    Only in movies.
    Actors paid for playing it,
    Hundreds of cameramen, directors, hairdressers, investors, stuntmen,
    Pushing buttons, having lunch, pushing buttons again, having lunch again,
    Play, cut, edit, erase, play, cut, edit, erase... until it looks right, sounds right,
    Then sell it,
    Get paid for it, for making believe...
    Then forget it,
    Next please...

    I knew it does not exist.

    Then I met you.



My Rose, The Legend, Your Dream...

    In her mouth she took my finger biting gently till it hurt,
    Grave her voice like Sunday's preaching while her eyes were spitting mirth,
    "That's for having me forgotten...", waving protest out of way,
    "...And for having best of reasons now to kiss the hurt away..."

    Felt her lips a fleeting moment tracing long the mark of teeth,
    While I feigned the throes of terror like the nation's dimmest wit,
    Then she dragged me... oh my goodness, to that hidden spot of green...
    "No, my love, it's not for love make, wipe that smug and silly grin.

    Let me nestle 'gainst your body on the leaves three autumns old,
    Tie my curls around your finger, hundred bands of purest gold,
    And before the evening shadows cloak the world in sparkling night
    Tell me once again the story of the castle and the knight."

    Closed her eyes, her fragile body working hard to find its nest,
    Then she smiled when moments later found it, tight against my chest,
    Know she knew the curse is raging through her blood two summers strong,
    "One more time..." each day she pleaded, "...need a dream to take along."

    Touched her shoulder, was it trembling with anticipation's lust,
    Trusting me to find the colors... "...paint that dream that have... I must!"
    Cleared my throat, that lump of sadness should stay out the gates of dream,
    And the whispers started flowing, building trickle to a stream...

    "Once upon..." she squeezed my fingers spelling delicate delight,
    "Once upon... a spaceship landed..." and she pinched... I screamed, alright!...
    "Once upon... before the mountains..." she just squealed and snuggled close,
    Will my rusty rhyming magic paint the blush back on my rose?...


    «Once upon, before the mountains bartered might for ageless life,
    Much before a thorn my heart pierced and its rose became my wife...»

    Blinding smile... «...Time when the oceans rolled the earth three times around,
    And through valleys petals opened with a tinkling crystal sound,

    In the Ever Morning kingdom ruled the king of Fearless White,
    Proud his castle stabbed the mountain sprinkling world with misty light,
    White clad armies roamed the kingdom spreading peace to Morning's end,
    White maned horses wildly roving never caring guide or wend,

    Rides a knight in aimless wander scouting village, town and dwell,
    Prince of Light he is, as fearless as his father... stories tell
    That his sword has tasted dozens hearts from hind the twilight zone,
    And days soon he'll be bequeathed with the scepter and the throne.

    Black of eye and black of tresses, bronze of skin and bare of foot,
    Shrieks the wind in whirling wonder at his mare of blackest soot,
    Night, the name the horse was given, young of seasons, shining bright,
    Stolen from the pride of stables yonder way in Ever Night.

    Rides the prince. In seven seasons, time the petals turn to red
    By the laws of days forgotten, he be king, and he be wed,
    Long the kingdom, up the mountains, cross the desert's burning hole
    Ever looking for a princess, wise of mind, and soft of soul.

    Thousand maidens, brave and pretty, he has met at bid of king,
    Not a one his heart has plundered to be worth of kingdom's ring,
    Now upon unsaddled fury black of mane and odd of sight
    Burns the distance long the border with the evil land of night.

    In the distance... lord of blazes... does he see a party's dust
    Nearing fast the narrow passage cut through mountain's ageless crust?...
    Riders five, is... black?... the color streaming back on wake of trot,
    Black the fire in his eye's gleam and his blood turns scalding hot.

    With a warring yell of anger speeds his mount into the clash,
    Out his sword, the gleaming metal posed for dealing deadly slash,
    Sights the party onslaught coming fore they time have had to flee,
    Turn the black maned hooded horses smooth of shape and high of knee,

    Leads the party one sole rider, hundred paces head of rest...
    Five to one? I did one hundred... princely blade thrusts height of chest...
    Ten more paces... swishing metal ready is to bite the bone...
    ...Bolts his mount... a chilling sudden... and he crushes into stone...

    Fast returns the black caped rider signing others back to stay,
    Off the horse, the blade rides skywards and the cape falls out of way,
    On his four, his eyes a blazing, ready is the prince to die...
    Gushing blood, his sight disturbing, paints in gold the cloudless sky...

    Paints in gold?... What is this vision that I see before I pass?...
    Witch of sorrows and delusions changing knight to... fairy lass?...
    "Take my life, my pride you've taken, cut from chest my kingdom's brand,
    And return your evil kingdom, prince and horse - your prize be grand..."

    Flowing gold crowns face of pallor thin like sculpted marble leaf,
    Priceless rubies shaped by masters into lips beyond belief,
    Fire blue, oh, burning passion, pouring out from sorrowed eyes,
    Which the angry boasting fury with a feather ease defies.

    "Take your life? Like way back seasons, you my horse took like a thief,
    And my heart has sunk in sadness with an endless cutting grief?
    This my horse, that gift was given by my fairy wishing well,
    Day before the Shadows Wizard cast her dead with wicked spell.

    You a prince, or thief of common and your brand was forged with gold?
    Pick your sword, let's see your address, if your arm as word is bold."
    Fast the war-men move towards her... "Back!" she commands, soft her say,
    Bowing heads they back ten paces, grim and mean as they obey.

    Hard of face the prince, his dark eyes burn with fire never known...
    "If my sword I pick this one time you are dead before you groan..."
    Not a muscle. Not a heart beat. Not a blink betrays her mind.
    One slight move, his hilt of nowhere in his hand its way did find,

    Rears the horse... the war-men crouching... she is waiting proud and tall...
    One sharp move... in two the sword breaks and to ground he lets it fall.
    Loud the silence, is there glimmer in her eye for moment short
    As her gaze the gate finds open to his heart's untrodden fort?

    Is his face hiding the flurry of the flame's despotic surge
    Crushing like a giant hammer with an evil pounding urge?
    Is the link of waking thunder just a passing moment's whim,
    Or the starting page of tempest as their hearts with fury brim?

    "Come my princess, horses nearing... white flagged carts are closing fast..."
    "Princess!?...""Yes, Ei-Leen they name me, black the banner up my mast,
    Fearsome Night my graceful father, for whose sake I live and fight,
    And your enemy... forever, fare thee well, the Prince of Light."

    Boots undoes, then bare of ankle in one graceful move she mounts...
    "Night I called her..." "Same as I did..." and her anger no more counts,
    Forward leans, the neck embracing and long whispering in ear,
    Suddenly the muscled body long the spine seems like to shear,

    Slowly out protrude slim wedges linked by tense and shiny hide,
    Trotting forward ever faster, till it changes trot to glide...
    "But you missed the word of magic..." so she calls and up they climb
    One black horse... a gift of magic, one proud princess in her prime...

    Lone he stays, his faithful war-men rushing fast to join his side,
    "Was that witch?..." "No, that your queen was..." and his smile is streaming wide,
    Looks of wonder... "Are you hurt prince?" "Yes..." he says and mounts a cart,
    "Deadly... twice. My pride was shattered. Second time... right through the heart."

    Back to castle, up the stairways he is skipping twos and threes,
    "Lord my father, where your hiding, 'cause my heart's a summer breeze,
    Bride I found, I need your blessing, need your wisdom's guiding steer,
    Mother sweet, your understanding, and the warmth I so revere..."

    "Is it true?" the king's soft thunder rumbles slowly through the halls,
    At his side, with age set beauty, lights the queen the somber walls,
    "It is true. I beg your pardon, time and time you said you pray
    That the peace rules long the twilight, hold to put to kill and slay,

    Wild of ways I've been and rowdy, keeping far from getting wise,
    This the right path be of learning, was my foolish blind surmise,
    Then in very little moments, almost none in passing time,
    I have learned the truth of living when my face rubbed down in slime...

    Lord my father, queen my mother, is my wish to offer truce
    Ever Night, its king, its people, ban from land war and abuse,
    Proud Ei-Leen, sweet wildest fairy, offer her my heart, my hand,
    Offer her my throne and scepter, offer her my home, my land."

    Grave the face and hard the burden, as the king takes son to chest,
    Soft the queen's majestic bearing as her lips his forehead pressed,
    Speaks the king... "Light Wizard's dwelling is the place that now you go,
    Now the time the kingdom's telling you shall find and you shall know.

    Go!" Then out of rooms he paces, was there sign of tender lurch?
    Lingers back the queen one moment... "...down your heart, go deep and search..."
    First in life cuts one deep furrow young man's forehead. Puzzled. Lone.
    Time has come to stop his looking. Time has come that he be shown.

    Way above the castle's towers, high above the eagle nest,
    Gropes for hold the climbing figure, his young body aches for rest,
    On he crawls, his fingers bleeding from the shards of broken stone,
    Gushing cuts adorn his body to the depth of gleaming bone,

    One more cliff, then one more valley, then the last of hanging rocks,
    On the gate of silent dwelling with his last of power knocks,
    "If to ask, your way has come here, then be gone or made to dust,
    If to know, then join my table, and my ways you have to trust..."

    "Come to learn..." the prince is gasping, and the gate he pushes in,
    In the dusk a tiny figure, ageless old and ageless thin,
    At a sign, a gleaming chalice waits the cracked and gaping mouth,
    "You the first that ever mounted through the deadly cliffs to south."

    "I the first that burns for knowledge, I the first that needs be told,
    I the first that back my castle wants before my blood is cold,
    You have taught my king and father, and his father fore of that,
    And throughout the changing seasons to the day the world was flat,

    This as much my tutors told me, write and read, and fighting, ruling,
    But the great of all them riddles was not solved by my poor schooling,
    Why there Morning, Night, and Twilight, why there war and blood and strife,
    Why can't I my heart's call follow, Night's sweet princess call my wife?"

    "Prince of Light, first drink the water, then be seated and await,
    And the knowledge you be given through your spirit's open gate.
    Then your mind will have the reason and your spirit be awake,
    But your heart will be the master of decisions you will take.

    Ei-Leen princess is aseated with Night Wizard, cross the ridge,
    She has come with quest for knowledge, for her pain a crossing bridge,
    Fate has played a cruel caper on two hearts unripe to fend,
    There's no cure in wand of magic, to this wound there is no mend."

    Drinks the prince the breezy water, eyes feel heavy, slows his breath,
    "Did you poison me, oh, wizard... is your learning worth of death?..."
    As his head falls on the table and his spirit starts to spin,
    And his mind discovers knowledge soaked in pain, in lust, in sin.

    Thousands seasons fore his birth time, fore the wizards scribed the laws,
    Mighty were both Night and Morning, trusting each its sacred cause,
    Knights in shining fearsome armor waiting for the word of king,
    Each on horse alive with magic, horse with mighty spread of wing.

    Armies lined the endless borders mounted proud on horses tall,
    White of mane this side of mountain, black of mane beyond the wall.
    Each, the wilderness of Twilight wanted conquer to its needs,
    Twilight... land of magic forests, land of spells where winged horse breeds.

    Three the wizards, great of power, Light this side, and Night beyond,
    While the greatest, Shadows master, watched the land where winged horse spawned,
    Ten the times they human folly tried to rein with mighty spells,
    But the greed and thirst for glory burned like thousand wicked hells.

    Ten the times they herds of horses white as snow or black as coal,
    Offered gift to warring armies hard of brow and dry of soul,
    Ten the times they linked by marriage Morning house with house of Night,
    Followed by most wicked slaughters in that never ending fight.

    Thousand thousands died in battles in an ever present roar,
    Deathly plagues, and devastation raised the count by many score,
    Till that time the wizards counseled and the anger burned their eyes,
    Either we will end the slaying or is time for world's demise.

    Mountains steep both sides of Twilight they have forged at move of hand,
    Narrow passages for riders only few through deepest sand,
    And the laws, those fearsome rulings for all human taking breath,
    Quarter none, and one the verdict all offenders face - it's death.

    No winged horse be sold or given to be mount of prince or king,
    No more herds will lead in battle armored knights triumph to bring,
    No more arrows hail descending like a torrent from the sky...
    No pretense, if vain if valid. Those who break the law will die.

    No more marriage Night to Morning, be it servant, knight, or king,
    No such vows young lives to couple if by promise if by ring,
    No more infants born in fury, living through the breaking tie...
    No pretense, if vain if valid. Those who break the law will die.

    Wakes the prince, his fever fading, drenched in sweat his body hurts,
    On his cot under the blankets, torn his silken pricey shirts,
    "Oh, dear mother, need your softness, need your loving gentle guide,
    Whence I got inside the castle, wheresoever shall I ride?...

    Cuts my chest with nonesuch passion for a lass I once have seen,
    With a craving burn my insides splitting body heart to spleen,
    Grips my father's fathers vileness this damned world in iron claw,
    And it weighs like seven mountains this accursed wizard's law.

    Is bewitched I? please tell me, let my head upon your lap,
    Hide my shameful tears from skylight with your garment's perfumed flap,
    I have never known such beauty lies in foe's bedeviled lands,
    I would give my life and kingdom for one touch of Ei-Leen's hands..."

    Pale's the queen's autumnal beauty, tenderly she holds his head,
    Bathe her eyes in endless sorrow for a dream forever dead,
    Joyful visions, wedding, sucklings... changed to fright of morrow's time,
    This young man that out her womb tore, will commit the deadly crime.

    "Rush to stables, there your father waits for you with grief and pride,
    Know! he loves you. And would gladly give his life and take your side.
    Now he knows you of his breed is, fit to be majestic king,
    He who loves with no regretting, is befit to wear his ring.

    Go son, hide. And may the powers laying wrath in wizards' hands
    Guide your step and watch your spirit as your path along they wend."
    Down the steps, between the columns, does he know what there awaits?
    As with hasty steps he rushes through the stable's wooden gates,

    Now he's running, passing horses, mares with foals and stallions proud,
    White of mane, tails wildly fanning, hooves the ground are biting loud,
    There, at end, in shadowed corner, waits the king and grave his stare,
    By his side, staining the shadows, one black maned and shining mare...

    "Night I called her...", "Night I called her..." ...what's this echo strange of sound,
    Bouncing from the graceful figure clad in paleness so profound,
    At her side... oh, wizards magic, side by side with Fearless White,
    Wrinkled, huge, yet bowed and weary, is the mighty Fearsome Night.

    "Ei-Leen...", "Prince...", they clash in ardor with the power of a beast,
    Smashing mouths, hands clutching, fingers wrapping each to iron fist...
    "Hurry children, mount, be vanished, draws the season to an end
    When the wrath for deeds forbidden does arise and does impend,

    Hide among the herds of Twilight shepherded by fairies kind,
    None but them shall know your dwelling, as with each you stay entwined,
    Lose these worlds and live your wild dream, forests green and lakes deep blue,
    And if day will come to perish, you have lived your fire through.

    Mount... now go!... your kings command you..." and the trot is dying way,
    Fades a shape black mane a flutter, and the black gives way to grey,
    And the grizzly wizened faces of two enemies of old
    Fight a bitter losing battle with a spark in eye once cold...

    Twilight... home to none but fairies, wild the horses, thick the herds,
    Times... the sky is thick with stallions chasing fast evading birds,
    Roaming fields, no snares, no wires, battling fiercely wild and free,
    And for long and magic moments rubbing necks in tender spree.

    Fragile fairies, chasing horses riding swarms of butterflies,
    Spry with boundless driving vigor down to earth and up to skies,
    Playing tunes like crystal water gushing out of rocky springs
    Dripping down from top of mountain long a harp's enchanted strings.

    Mid the whirlwind, mid the valley, mid the racing colored wings,
    Night is pacing neighing softly, with a peace befit of kings,
    On her back a prince, a princess, budding life demands its right,
    Soon a crying human infant will raise fists towards the light.

    They have bathed in the shadows, skins alight with cooling dew,
    They have dived mid of the rivers, tingling flesh a bluish hue,
    They have loved atop the mountain melting snow to steaming stream,
    They have burnt with raging passion deep a rock's smoldering seam,

    World have stopped, no time, no anguish, only rivers sparkling by,
    Know they knew that with a new life, is the time to come and die.
    On a bed of crimson flowers, screaming life an infant's born,
    As the horse they gently mounted, hushed all Twilight, sad, forlorn.

    In the hall big candles burning with a scent of creeping blight,
    King of Night and Queen of Morning, King of Morning, Queen of Night,
    On a dais three wizards throning, tiny figures throbbing might,
    On the floor, the infant sleeping, proud Ei-Leen, her Prince of Light.

    Thin the wizard's voice, and feeble, but unblinking eye and mind,
    "This the infant, Night to Morning in one kingdom he will bind,
    Rule will make the law of justice, loved will be by beast and man,
    Never fore such peaceful joyance since the age that time began.

    Law is law, and all are equal. No absolving is to come,
    Yet from this the moment onward, old to new will do succumb,
    Old the rules of world, will vanish, new the rules we here decree,
    Roll will start the night, the morning, round the world for all to see,

    Prince of Light, you'll dress the morning, bound to light for evermore
    Ei-Leen princess, night your dwelling, light for you come nevermore,
    Prince of Light, the Sun we name you, Ei-Leen... Starlight, like nonesuch,
    Evermore each other chasing, nevermore each other touch.

    Long as ever is your passion, long as ever Sun will burn,
    Rage the fires of damnation, deep your insides coil and churn,
    Thousands hearts will sing your glory for a love all one has found,
    You will never reach your Starlight, bottomless your pain profound...

    Beautiful beyond description, you, the Starlight, nights adorns,
    Lone and lost inside the blazing that your passion ever mourns,
    Thousands hearts will sing your beauty praising your infinite charms,
    Never will you feel the fire of your Sun's embracing arms."

    To this day the sun in fury chases vainly starlight love,
    Fire pouring in his madness scorching worlds from far above,
    And in vain the starlight trembles day to day for moment's bliss,
    All she can is sprinkle dew tears, which he dries with fire's kiss...»


    Now you smile... Your hand is holding crippling tight the rose I bought
    Years ago from that old gypsy, when my eye your blue smile caught,
    Never did you let that withered... crumbling petals... broken stem,
    Far from hand, from eye, from bosom... your most treasured gift and gem.

    Now I can... My hand is touching your left breast. Your thunder's dead.
    Like the rose my body crumbles, in your hair I sink my head,
    Damn the curse and damn the battle that you lost with queenly grace,
    Damn the angels that are singing in your warm and sad embrace,

    Now you know... And I will wonder till my hand you'll take and guide,
    Did my dream join rose-dust perfume on that long eternal ride,
    Did you find a happy ending, one for which your heart did yearn,
    «When the sun does touch the starlight and in love and flames they burn?...»




    Going by,
    Minutes, hours, days...

    Lost to the world, lost to us,
    One day more of nothing, one day less of everything.
    I open my eyes, your eyes are closed,
    I dream, do you?
    I close my eyes, you open yours,
    I dream, do you?
    Flowing numbness invades the senses,
    The touch, the sight... is pain a sense?
    Probably it is not,
    Immune to numbness, pitiful in its vainglory,
    Boasting arrogantly the meaningless conquest of my mortality,
    Dying with me, each day closer,
    Getting there,
    In days, hours, minutes...



Thoughts Of You...

    Seeing you,
    A shadow passing, softly caressing your brow,
    Startled you regard... then smiling, eyes you close, because you know,
    In the blue
    And placid haven that your eyelids fiercely guard,
    Splashed a whispered thought, devouring, like a misplaced sunrise shard.

    Curled your lips
    In ever wonder at the ripened seed of blaze,
    Pouring stems of bundled brightness while the skin turns blushing maze,
    As it creeps
    Around your body plunging feelers deep your blood,
    Dressing whispers cloth of thunder, dressing teardrops boiling flood...




    I cut a thin slice of heart,
    It did not hurt, it was so thin...
    I shaped it, perforated it, made it into a square stamp,
    Glued it to my email and sent it.
    You smiled, you were not surprised to get it,
    Of course not,
    You picked the thick album out of your computer,
    Page three thousand four hundred sixty seven,
    Fifth row, carefully placed it there next to the previous one,
    So many were there...

    You leafed through the album's pages,
    Backwards, throwing glances at this stamp, then this one,
    Here... this one, a thin slice of heart shaped as a smiley,
    When I told you I love you for the one thousandth time,
    What an event it was, you did not even pay attention we were already there...
    And this one, a tinge of blue merging with the red,
    When I called you and you were not there...
    And the red turned blue... when you told me of your pain,
    And I found your pain painting my heart in your season's colors...
    The fiery heart shaped one, when I told you I love you for the first time,
    The flame shaped, when we made love...
    Back to the first pages, not even slices of heart yet, but dried out drops of blood,
    Thin stains, telling of the future editions, the future stamps,
    The red, deep, final editions,
    A huge collection,
    Worthless to others,
    Priceless to you.

    You answered.
    I picked your stamp and put it in my album
    Do you know that most of your heart is already in my album?
    And mine in yours?




    Rising from the sea,
    Blinding me,
    Hundreds of droplets desperately clinging to your bare skin
    Then giving in with anguished splash cries to gravitation's hungry fingers,
    Streaking towards calling mother earth,
    Exploding in flashes of delight,
    Their wet hearts sparkling in the beauty of a dazzling last microscopic lightning,
    The memory of your skin's touch their destruction,
    Their consuming fire,
    Their blessed last moment of hell's embrace...

    Rising from the sea,
    Rolling in the sand,
    Millions of silica rocks leaving their warm nests
    For the scorching nest of your body's landscape,
    Arrogant mountains, rough plains, precipitous crevices,
    Cool lakes,
    Cocooning you in a thick shapeless layer,
    Molding itself constantly in the ever changing shape of your body,
    Holding hands, breaking away, newcomers claiming renewed ownership,
    Grinding against each other, pushing, scrambling for a place close to life,
    Close to the rivers of melted fire crisscrossing wildly in the depths,
    Deep underneath your skin clothing,
    Close to the welcoming softness of your abdicating flesh...

    Rising from the sea,
    Wading through the wind, through air,
    Thousands of miniature skin bumps your only garment,
    Woven into your skin by long, thin fairy fingers,
    Competing in beauty with your ruby tipped breasts,
    Pitting their numerous armies in a long battle for supremacy
    Then giving in to the body's call
    And adorning rather than fighting along your thighs, back,
    Battling for a place of honor round your nipples' roots,
    A wild, rugged landscape,
    Rippling with the pleasures of freshness carried by a caressing sea breath,
    The forests of soft hair along their crests undulating like proud flags,
    Cool shadows in the endless valleys,
    Miniature sunshines reflecting from their salt crystal tipped peaks...

    Then I came.
    Wiped the water,
    Brushed away the sand,
    Set fire to your skin,
    Made love to you
    Conquering your mountains, valleys, wild landscape...
    I, the conqueror.
    You, my master.



Mixed Senses...

    The smile hanging at the corners of your eyes,
    A tear sliding from your lips,
    Your voice... I can taste it,
    Smooth, sweet, rolling lazily in my mouth,
    Tasting like music,
    Like the perfume of your thoughts,
    Drunken with the whiffs of lust emanating from the depths of your passion,
    Touching your blue,
    Your skin glistening with the sweat of fulfilling the promise,
    I see the salty smell,
    Enveloping me, blinding my ears,
    Deafening my eyes,
    Oh, the smell of you, the taste, the sound,
    The sight,
    The touch,
    Drunken beyond return and reason,
    In a world of my own,
    Where senses lose meaning
    And my only link to reality is one single window...

    Then reality crudely kicks in,
    And smell is smell, and sight is sight,
    And pain unending...




    She is bleeding,
    To death.

    Her body wound opening a gushing cut in her spirit,
    Ripping like a bottomless ravine the landscape of her soul,
    Wide mouthed, rough edged, shrieking
    While dreams fly away,
    Hopes dwindle to nothing,
    Tomorrows absorb a lusterless blue crust,
    And consuming passion turns to candle flicker...

    I try to cover the opening,
    With my hands, feet, my whole body,
    Clutching at her passing dreams and hopes,
    Trying to grab some tomorrows,
    Some sparks of the dimming passion...

    She smiles, she knows, she regrets,
    And she walks through my fields, through her garden,
    Picking my flowers, inhaling their fragrance,
    And dying,
    Each breath a bit of poison,
    A bit of why, of if, of could have been, of never.

    And I let her go, knowing
    That my only right
    Is being part of the departing dreams,
    And joining her
    In the wide gaping mouth of eternity
    Where she promises to wait for me.

    She won't wait for long.
    Because the night descending on her landscape
    Will engulf me,
    Carrying me to our wedding bed, soft, dark, eternal...



Killing The Bird...

    Wild, roaming the skies, the forests,
    Sneaking like an arrow through mountain high gales
    And emerging breathlessly on the other side,
    Swishing like a sword through thick flower highways
    And climbing effortlessly into the unending blue roof of the world,
    Sparkles rich, melodies rife,
    Reveling in the day's birth as in the day's death,

    She found me.
    She sat on my shoulder.
    She started singing the sun in my ears,
    She started picking grains from my hand,
    I fell in love with a wild bird,
    She loved the warmth, the safety of my shoulder,
    Taking off for short moments only to land again,
    In the same spot,
    Singing, picking grains, singing...

    One day, she was shot.
    She could flee, she could fly away, save herself,
    But she prefered to land back on my shoulder,
    Red drops of blood staining my shirt,
    She didn't want to go back into the wilderness,
    She just waited, singing relentlessly,
    Looking at me with a question in her eyes,
    My trembling hand unable to stop the terrible dripping dance,
    Much as I tried.
    Till it stopped by itself.
    She died.
    And I died with her.



Black And Letters...

    Painters can,
    I envy painters.
    They can paint skies,
    They can mix colors, every imaginable shade of blue, violet, red,
    They can create every unnamed memory of yellow, of green, of lines,
    Touching the surface,
    The brush with a random mind of its own
    An extension of the painter's hand, heart,
    Flowing in a unique stream of shapeless events
    Frozen forever in a time frame of their own,
    For eyes to absorb,
    To feel, to touch, to drown...

    Painters are allowed,
    I envy painters.
    They are allowed to describe shapes,
    Intimately touching forbidden corners,
    Forgotten corners,
    The softness of an offered breast,
    The roundness of a body skyline,
    The fire of burning passion under closed eyelids,
    Details blinding, clutching at senses,
    Shapes permeated by an overwhelming desire,
    For eyes to follow,
    To imagine, to dream...

    Poets can not.
    Poets are not allowed.
    Poets are given one color, black,
    A white canvas,
    A few letters,
    One pen.
    Poets are not painters. Can poets paint?
    Can they break the black into dazzling rainbows,
    Are they allowed to touch intimacy,
    Touch, describe, show,
    Can eyes follow the poet's brush?
    Can poets paint?

    I met you.
    And you went through the pains of showing me how to see my black,
    How to hold my hand, read the letters,
    How to use my mind's infant brushes and teach them,
    Teach them to break the black, to break the letters,
    Break their mixture into all the bluish tones of the skies,
    The purple tones of sunset and blood,
    The kaleidoscope tones of flower beds drowning under butterfly clouds,
    Teach them to paint a breast, a smiling mouth, a quivering lip,
    To mix black and mix letters and burn the white of the canvas
    Into smoldering charred witness to the fires of passion.

    You taught me.
    The beauty of the prettiest, wildest of all colors,
    The colors of momentary change,
    Of shared dreams,
    Of fading far away whispers,
    The colors of your choice,
    My colors.
    Our colors.

    I don't envy painters.
    You taught me the beauty of my colors.
    Black. And letters.



Other Flowers...

    Plastic. Waxed paper. Painted silk.
    Beautiful flowers,
    Fleurs de lis in shades of stained white and fading orange,
    Roses in perfect reds and whites and yellows,
    Carnations shapelessly shaped in copies of self,
    Artistic perfection, unforgettable,
    Beautiful, ageless, eternal.
    Plastic. Waxed paper. Painted silk.

    Flesh. Blood.
    A beautiful flower,
    Colored by sun burn, painted by shyness blush,
    Sprinkled by smiles,
    Beautiful, aging, short lived.
    Flesh. Blood.

    I made my choice.
    Short lived.




    I waited for you,
    In the rain,
    I made a special request to heaven's orderlies
    And they agreed to the deal -
    We'll provide the rain,
    Then we'll take whatever we wish.
    It was fine with me -
    You provide the rain and then take whatever you wish,
    What do I have that is of such value to you
    Compared to your rain for me?...

    I waited for you,
    In the rain,
    Head up to the sky,
    Mouth open, eyes open,
    Arms stretched out to the sides of my naked body,
    Drinking, absorbing,
    Feet deep in the warm mud of puddles mixing with leaves,
    Cool drops drilling into my body,
    Tickling rivulets pouring down my skin,
    Small blobs building along the thinning extremities of hair ends
    Till the call of the long fall to earth became too strong a burden
    Rushing them to an awaiting death...
    Waiting for you to come,
    To run your wet fingertips through my hair, along my spine, my legs,
    Your wet arms encircling my waist,
    Your wet breasts rubbing against my trembling chest,
    Our wet bodies crushing with a terrible splash into the stinging wet grass
    In the spasms of wet love...

    I waited for you,
    In the rain.
    You didn't come.

    And the rain is over,
    And dark sunshine pours into the world,
    And the heavenly orderlies are over to this side claiming their due.
    I will pay,
    What do I have of any value to them?
    My life?
    They are welcome,
    There is no rain in my life anymore.




    Two lives,
    Two planes,
    Separated by intricate mathematics of chance and probability,
    Unknown formulas which created the yesterdays
    Unknown rules governing the tomorrows,
    The today fuzzy and amorphous.
    I tried to develop the knowledge,
    To find the secret tunnels connecting the planes,
    Trying parallel universes, magical words, unrealities,
    Filling pages upon pages with trial and error experiments,
    Then scrapping pages upon pages of useless information,
    All the while the one incorruptible arbiter indifferently marking points against me,
    Marking minutes, hours, days...

    Misery, pain...
    Is this the only secret passage
    Allowing me to redefine the laws of this world,
    Bringing the two evolving planes within touch of each other?
    Within... contact,
    Blinding explosion...
    End? Beginning?

    I keep searching,
    Impossibilities are endless,
    One solution only, unknown,
    Will the incorruptible arbiter allow for just one bit of corruption,
    Just enough to tell me
    I will get there... ever... or never?




    Floating dust in blinding sunshine,
    Random patterns void of shape,
    Twirling whiffs my sight assailing,
    Senseless doubts my reason rape.

    Rushing shapes stream through my vision,
    Blurred the noise, and strange the smells,
    Treading marks my brain adorning,
    Crawling pain the longing tells.

    There, beyond my mortal weakness
    Lies a land so sharp and clear,
    In my folly sunken senses
    All I feel is cold and fear.



Dreams, Wishes, Hope, Luck, Reality...

    I know the definition of dreams,
    Realities locked in the infinite labyrinths of our minds
    Created by the spark of God burning in each of us,
    Rushing through the infinite maze at a volition of their own,
    Times uncontrollable, times unavoidable, times painful,
    Times beautifully colored with spring, with summer,
    With falling leaves, snow, sparkling springs,
    Heart linking to mind linking to life,
    A world beyond reach,
    Further away than the moon, than the stars,
    All the laws of the world we know,
    The laws of dreams we do not,
    So close to us, so remote,
    So unattainable.

    I know the definition of wishes,
    Paths from dreams to reality,
    Paths we want to create, to destroy,
    Sometimes calling them prayers,
    Other times calling them curses, songs, whispers,
    Holding hands,
    Colorful sunsets, smiles, promises of forever,
    The bridge anchored into the unattainable,
    Stretching over the wide impossible,
    And endlessly searching for a foothold into slippery reality's banks.

    I know the definition of hope,
    Dreams inside dreams,
    Dreams inside wishes,
    Cobwebs hiding sight and reason and reality,
    Holding in place castles hanging above crevasses,
    Clothing crumbling mountains with an indestructible net,
    Linking dragons' might to depths of despair
    And invoking the outer worldly into this world to keep the link intact,
    To blow power in the dragons,
    To ease the weight of despair,
    To open the one way door from dream to reality.

    I know the definition of luck,
    When the cobwebs turn steel mesh,
    And the door opens,
    And one spark of the dream pours into reality,
    And the door closes again,
    The meaningless lottery of life.

    I know the definition of reality.
    Dream stays dream,
    Wish stays prayer,
    Hope stays pain,
    And luck is a statistical event void of poetry, beauty, and warmth.




    Then she tumbled down the mountain,
    Rolling pebble sharp of edge,
    First a tinkle, then a rumble,
    Then a thunder joined its pledge,
    Stone to rock, then mighty boulders,
    Half a mountain pouring down,
    Splitting trunks and crackling timber,
    Breaks the mountain's forest crown,
    Deep the valley I am waiting,
    Red my roses painted blood,
    Thorns alight and petals shining,
    Stumbles on the crushing flood,
    To the raving raging fury
    Arms I open grinning wild,
    Trough cascading mud and glory
    Wading like a brainless child,
    Till I smother warm and tender
    And my garden gently dries,
    And a path the pebble's burning
    Till against my heart it dies.




    You sensed me behind your shoulder,
    You could not see me,
    But you sensed me,
    You turned your head back sharply, wildly,
    Like an animal,
    Your eyes red and swollen,
    Your lips drawn in a mix of snarl, grin and hope,
    Your fingers groped at empty space trying to get hold of that presence,
    You knew I am there,
    I returned,
    I was never away yet I returned,
    And you lifted your head letting my invisible lips touch your neck,
    And you opened your shirt letting my invisible hands grab your breasts,
    And you opened your lips letting my invisible teeth bite them,
    You sighed, you moaned,
    Unconcerned about those around you,
    They, invisible to you the way I was,
    But me... you could feel, you could feel my touch,
    You could feel no one's touch but mine,
    As I ravaged your body in senseless savagery,
    As your laughter suddenly roared like a tigress her hunger satisfied,
    As you finally cuddled against my disembodied presence
    And together we floated home...



Who Said Sad Is Blue?...

    Who said sad is blue?

    Sad is sunny.
    Hordes of undisciplined rays invading darkest corners,
    Hordes of drooling babies hungrily clutching mother's breast,
    Hordes of mad butterflies conquering horizon to horizon.
    Sad is tender.
    Tender rays exploding in colored waterfalls at sharp glass edges,
    Tender babies kicking mindlessly at a world desperately waiting for them,
    Tender butterflies living one lifetime between one sunrise to one sunset.
    Sad is music.
    Rays plucking at closed eyelids,
    Babies singing with toothless mouths,
    Butterflies dancing at a tune they are lone to hear.

    Sad is sunshine, tenderness, music... without you.




    Round and round my arms were going,
    Round your body crawling, flowing,
    Hungry snakes of awesome power
    Desperate your body's flower
          To devour...

    In my cradle's muscled prison,
    Bare of mind and bare of reason,
    Sleeps your body bleeding power,
    Slowly melting in a flower
          To devour...

    Then my coils I open slowly,
    Sinful thoughts allied with holy,
    As I strike with passion's power
    The awaking gentle flower
          To devour...

    Gone the storm into the thunder
    With my body torn asunder
    By the dream's decaying power
    Where's this illusory flower
          To devour?...




    Watched the train
    The train is parting
    Parting way into the west,
    Wish I was
    I was the flower
    Flower tight against your chest...

    Watched the smoke
    The smoke is lifting
    Lifting way into the sky,
    Wish I was
    I was the flower
    Flower drying in your eye...

    Watched the lamp
    The lamp is dying
    Dying way the one-way trail,
    Wish I was
    I was the flower
    Flower squashed upon the rail...

    Yes I do, I do remember as the wagons rolled in town
    Wagons rolled one starlit evening masking moon's eternal crown,
    Down you came, you came forever to seed springs into my life
    To seed springs into my Autumns till the clouds are flowers rife.

    Yes I do, I do remember as your sight my wishes shaped
    As your sight the dying embers of my passion wildly raped,
    Cloaked in beads, in beads of rolling gold along a moonbeam thread
    Gold along despairing fingers as the bodies fire wed.

    Yes I do, I do remember as you dressed in naked skin
    As you dressed in snow white satin glowing in your sated sin,
    Errs a heart, a heart is lonesome as a wagon swallows you
    Lonesome is my orphaned glory recollecting... yes, I do...

    Watched the train
    The train is parting
    Parting way. An empty nest.
    Wish I was
    I was the flower
    Flower tight against your chest...

    Watched the smoke
    The smoke is lifting
    Lifting way. An empty lie.
    Wish I was
    I was the flower
    Flower drying in your eye...

    Watched the lamp
    The lamp is dying
    Dying way. An empty tale.
    Wish I was
    I was the flower
    Flower squashed upon the rail...




    Soft light,
    The darkness stabbed by hundreds of candles spread over the floor,
    Flames waving, dark thin smoke drawing black shaky lines to the ceiling
    While your long silk dress flutters around your legs as you move,
    As you dance to a barely heard all engulfing sound,
    Your bare feet finding their way among the candles with animal ease,
    Toes testing the fire for seconds then leaping away in short stabs of pain,
    The dress
    Times touching the flame and your hands swiftly putting out the first spark signs,
    Times flowing upwards carried by the hot smoke,
    Revealing sharp flesh lines along your knees,
    Soft flesh lines along your thighs,
    For long seconds before in mock shame you pull it back down to your ankles.

    You approach,
    As I lay down propping my head against the wall,
    You half pirouette above me,
    For seconds shadowed glimpses of rounded pieces of heaven blinding my mind
    Swiftly disappearing inside folds of partly charred waves of silk,
    You pirouette again and again,
    Painful wants hitting me again and again
    When you land your burden of femininity upon my chest,
    My face lost in the folds of your garment,
    One single thin layer separating my senses from the shadowed mysteries of your body,
    Drunkenly taking in the mix of sweet roses soap smell
    And wild female hunger fragrance.

    You roll on the couch, alongside me, your thighs revealed,
    Your left shoulder strap fallen from the snowy heights of your shoulder,
    Your eyes reflecting the hundreds of flames in a sea of awakening fearsome fire,
    I see your dress disintegrating before my eyes in one magician's move,
    Soft mounds of flesh dressing your chest proudly stabbing the air with their fire tips
    Filling my lungs with ancient sinful blaze, while my eyes follow their punishing trail
    Down the lines of your navel, your curving waist,
    Your hidden corners of revealed passion,
    Flickering shadows enacting visions of winged dragons about to rip my chest
    As you lean towards me, above me, tempting my senses into insane oblivion,
    Your flesh shivering with delayed lust,
    Controlled madness pouring from your lips over my yielding hard body,
    I lie in wait,
    I count every single hair on your eyelashes, your eyebrows
    Watching fearfully the incisive whiteness of your teeth approaching my mouth,
    Biting deep till we both feel the dripping blood running down my chin,
    Terrible pain mingled with winds of lust as you search my body,
    Finding undeniable evidence to a crime about to happen,
    Moving my arms around your back
    Begging me to squash you inside the thickness of my skin, into my body,
    Letting scorching breath burn my eyelids into the misery of ending lust,
    Of ending passion,
    Of quiet, contentment, love.

    Your head on my chest.
    My fingertips counting the endless traces of dying pleasure
    As they roll and roll and roll along the uncovered paths of your skin.




    Riding, riding, riding, riding,
    Nightlong riding, daylong hiding,
    Garments torn of lowly beggar,
    In his folds a long sharp dagger,
    Long the ridges, down the valleys,
    Through wild forests' shadowed alleys,
    Riding, hiding, riding, hiding,
    Endless miles the fury striding,

    Trotting, trotting, trotting trotting,
    Endless trotting, ceaseless frothing,
    Beats the hoof its silent thunder
    Tearing night from night asunder,
    Long the rivers, down the mountains,
    Cutting paths through dirty fountains,
    Trotting, frothing, trotting, frothing,
    Frozen sea in eyesight clotting,

    Sweating, sweating, sweating, sweating,
    Mare a sweating, mind a fretting,
    Hind of lashes vicious visions
    Ripping heart with deep incisions
    Through the senses pouring ire
    While his seeing sword and fire,
    Sweating, fretting, sweating, fretting,
    Dripping blood the saddle wetting,

    Night has fallen, fallen, fallen, moonless skies adorn the trek,
    Shivers run from hoof to rider as he moves through wreck, through wreck,
    Sharp the stench, the stench, the rubble steaming up through clouds of dust,
    Bolts the horse, his drying gashes breaking crust, then crust, then crust.

    Kneels the rider side of timber, timber, timber, charred to stone,
    Trembling hands pick piece of clothing, clothing, clothing, bone, and bone,
    Little, little, copper, copper, shoe, and shoe, and ring, and ring,
    Eyes unseeing, eyes unseeing, linen dress and beads on string.

    Softly, softly, tender, tender, crumbling embers out of way,
    Withered flesh from pools of darkness, darkness, darkness, come away,
    Blooms the pain in silence, silence, silence screaming ripping chest,
    Wife, and son, and daughter, daughter, dog, and dog, to lay to rest.

    Mounds of earth, of earth are steaming lined beyond the forest edge,
    Horse is snorting, man is howling, howling, howling raging pledge
    Red be flowing, red be flowing, steaming rivers reeking death,
    As through mind, through mind, through body cuts a breeze of icing breath.

    What's this noise like crawling, crawling, crawling logs on rugged ground,
    What's this feel of scratching, scratching, scratching nails through whining sound?
    Way you go, you cruel vision, vision, vision born in hell,
    Life is none, is none, is buried draped in choking clouds of smell.

    From his crouching, crouching posture swollen eyes he lifts, he lifts,
    Out the depths, the depths of forest one huge shape towards him drifts,
    As his hand, his hand the sharpness of the metal, metal grabs
    Limping, limping, limping nears him and the muzzle softly jabs.

    "Ursus, Ursus, faithful servant, strong of mind and low of scowl,
    Lion hearted, lion hearted, sharp of fang and deep of growl,
    Was your power, power, power, you and brothers fearsome two
    Not enough the deadly, deadly, deadly cowards to subdue?"

    Slowly back into the forest, to the forest limps the dog,
    Dark the puss his back adorning thickened, thickened stinking fog,
    Till a clump of thorny bushes where he falls, he falls, he lies,
    Near a pair of dirty, dirty, dirty cheeks and frightened eyes.

    Deep the spasm, the spasm of torment running cross the rider's chest,
    As his fragile, fragile daughter picks to heart from thorny nest,
    Five her Autumns, five her Autumns, only seed to live through slay,
    Flowing tears for counted moments quell the grief, the grief away.

    Dark the forest, dark the forest, cool the shadow, cool the shadow,
    Way beyond the edge of forest, hidden meadow, meadow, meadow,
    Low the fire, boils the water, gentle, gentle deadly hands
    Feed the child, the wounds are scrapping, round the dog roll bands, roll bands.

    Seven days, then days more seven, seven nights, then nights, then nights,
    Sneaking through forgotten passes, valleys, valleys, heights, and heights,
    Reaching that forgotten cottage, cottage, cottage, poor of shape,
    Rich in love of man and woman, seven babes, and seven babes.

    On the porch he sits his baby, baby, baby sweet of cheek,
    In his eye the hopeless morrow, painted grey, and bleak, and bleak,
    One far look, far look, he watches as the woman hugs the child,
    And his eye stones trace of softness, and his heart roves wild, roves wild.

    Back his footsteps, back his footsteps, back his footsteps man, horse, dog,
    One long moment, one long moment by the mounds and scattered log,
    Spreading seeds of wildest berry, berry, berry top the ground,
    Last regard he slowly passes, mound, then mound, then mound, then mound.

    Sharp the dagger, long and deadly, deadly, deadly sharp of tang,
    Sharp the fang, wild mean and deadly dog and fang, and fang, and fang,
    Sharp the nail, short hard and deadly dressing hoof, then hoof, then hoof,
    Shivers night's unseeing kingdom, shivers hell's star lighted roof.

    Sweating, sweating, sweating, sweating,
    Mare a sweating, mind a fretting,
    Red the fury, hooves, and gallop,
    Heaving chests as break and scallop,
    Through the senses pouring ire,
    Red be flowing hot like fire,
    Sweating, fretting, sweating, fretting,
    Endless blood the saddle wetting,

    Trotting, trotting, trotting trotting,
    Endless trotting, ceaseless frothing,
    White the fury, fang, and growling,
    Ripping throats affrighted howling,
    Long the rivers, down the mountains,
    Red be flowing down the fountains,
    Trotting, frothing, trotting, frothing,
    Endless cold the eyesight clotting,

    Riding, riding, riding, riding,
    Nightlong riding, daylong hiding,
    Black the fury, black the dagger,
    Slashing wildly lofty swagger,
    Long the ridges, down the valleys,
    Red be flowing long the alleys,
    Riding, hiding, riding, hiding,
    Endlessly the fury striding,